Anam Cara
by rameau
Summary: When few words change lives. EJ and Sami story with a hint of Santo and Colleen.
1. prologue

_**A/N** Okay, I know I'm mean but I just had to post this before someone else snatches the topic I'm planning on writing **a short** EJami fic. All I have right now is a non-existing prologue but you'll know soon enough what it's about.  
P.S. I really didn't think that I would find it in me to write another EJami fic this soon. I still don't._

_Disclaimer: I don't own the characters nor the show. I just believe in possibilities._

"**Anam Cara"**

**Prologue**

"_The words I thought you would never say to me."_

"_The words I thought were to be left unsaid and unheard."_

Sami was working her way through the letters. She couldn't believe how insensitive Lucas had been about the romance of her great-aunt and this dashing foreigner, even him being an DiMera and all. _Santo. _The sound of his name made her shiver. Oh, how she wished she could have heard his accent and the enchanting words he said to Colleen. This had been a real life romance, a forbidden love that had ended in a tragedy. The thrill of discovering these old secrets made Sami feel alive again. She sought out the words again: _Anam Cara. _He had called her _Anam Cara._ Sami didn't know why those words held such a power over her but she knew they would change her life permanently.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

Sami stepped out of the shower and quickly dried herself. She stopped for a moment to feel her growing belly. She closed her eyes, pursed her lips and tasted the blood in her mouth. It had been so close. She had been so close to getting all she wanted. Lucas and Will would have been a family with the new baby. First she had found out that she couldn't trust in the new doctors in Salem University Hospital when they had forgotten to mention that she was having twins, a beautiful boy and a girl. For a shocking moment Sami had had to consider the possibility that her children might have different fathers. Then her mother had brought the bad, the worst possible news: EJ was the father of both of her children. Sami felt unconditional love for the children growing within her but she also felt uncontrollable anger and hate against their father. In a word, Sami felt torn.

She shook her head and felt the wet hair beating her neck as she quickly dressed herself. She took few breaths and stepped through the door to that sleazy motel room her father had brought them to safety. Sami had her towel with her just in case Lucas was still awake and wanting some attention. He wasn't, awake that is. He had thrown his clothes on to a chair and fallen asleep in the middle of the bed. Sami sniffed and wished she hadn't. Her husband was like garbage disposal, he took everything in and anyone near him could smell it. Quickly Sami tied her hair into a ponytail and snuck across the room. She took the letters and found some light. Sami wanted to read the magical words again and again. Somehow she had imagined that translating the letters would shed some of their magic but it hadn't. The words from years and years ago still had an significant effect on her. Sami trembled again. She turned to see the disarmingly slobbering face of her husband. _Why couldn't Lucas make her feel like this?_ The thought was quick and soon forgotten as her defences took place. _I'm happy. I've got the man I love and I've given our son the family he's always wanted. What about the family of her unborn twins?_ Sami had to shake her head again. She was happy or would be as soon as the this feud with the DiMeras would end and when EJ Wells would be out of their lives. Sami would be happy with Lucas and their children. She would be. She would.


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Wake up Sami!"

"What is it?" Sami woke up as Lucas was elbowing her. She had fallen asleep still holding the copies of those old love letters. Sami remembered falling asleep trying to imagine Colleens meeting with Santo and trying to figure out what Santo must have looked like. Judging by the DiMeras she knew today, Sami had imagined a dark stranger with a blurry face. No, it hadn't been like that. Just before she had fallen through the pink haze of her romantic dreams Sami had seen a familiar face. She knew it wasn't Lucas' face but had she been thinking of Brandon again. No, it was someone else but she couldn't remember who.

"Roman is here, we need to leave!" Lucas just said and went to get his clothes. Sami quickly gathered her things and rushed to the bathroom making Lucas grit his teeth. It was too early and he hadn't had his morning coffee.

"What is it dad?" Sami asked as they were escorted out of their safe haven.

"This is just procedure. This way we can make sure you are really safe", Roman said and closed the car door once Sami had gone in. He instructed the officers to leave and make sure no one followed them and took a step back as the car sped up away. A shadow parted from a wall and moved to tower over Roman.

"Thank you."

"I'm not doing this for you!" Roman spat the words without even trying to meet his victims gaze.

"Lucas, did dad tell you what is going on?" Sami asked after she had given up trying to see who was talking with her father. He shrugged and said:

"No. I'm sure they just want to make sure that the DiMera's don't know where we are."

"Would they be moving us then? Doesn't it make more sense to stay in that so called safe house than risk being seen while relocating?" Sami asked.

"I dunno", Lucas replied shrugging again, "I wonder did they, oh yes they did! Your dad brought us a basket of Carolines goodies. Now let's eat!"

"I'm not eating in the car! Lucas, stop. How can you think of food right now?"

"Beats reading those dusty letters you're hung up on", he said taking the first bite of a pie.

"And you have no sensitivity what so ever. These are better than a romance novel", Sami replied pouting again. It was taking way too much convincing to keep Lucas interested in the letters. Sami needed to find someone else to talk to and fast.

"Hey driver! Where are we going?"


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

"The Pub? Dad really thinks the pub is a safe place for us to be?" Sami was horrified.

"What would you prefer? Walking to the DiMera mansion and having a cup of tea with your old pal Stefano? Not to mention Tony and EJ", Lucas sniped.

"You are right. Of course you are right", Sami said and conjured some life around the corners of her mouth. Lucas never bothered to look high enough to see his wife's real feelings. He didn't know why, but suddenly he started thinking back to one of their non-weddings. That time he had found his bride in bed with another tall, dark and dashing man the night before their wedding. Later he had found out that his mother had set the whole thing with Brandon up and regretted his rash judgement. This time he had been there for Sami. This time Lucas had made himself stand by his bride and confront his mother. Had it been because of his growing dislike of his mothers influence in his life or had it been more of not wanting to fall in the same trap a third time. Lucas couldn't really say which it was but he knew his choice had had nothing to do with wanting to be there for Sami no matter what. Without the unborn babies he could have agreed to postpone the wedding and clear things up with Sami for once and for all and now he had found out that Sami's twins weren't his after all. Lucas would have to be Austin to EJ's Will and more. If the truth would be told, he wouldn't even have that. Lucas felt his jawline tense again. His thoughts were drifting towards Carrie.

"Lucas? Are you coming?" Sami asked but chose not to shake him to awareness. He looked so sad and broken and Sami wondered what she had done now to cause it. She got out of the car and went in to meet her mother.

"Mum!" Sami stopped hesitating for a fraction of a second. Marlena didn't even notice or she simply didn't care. The mother embraced her firstborn daughter and helped her to sit.

"What is that?" Sami asked as she saw something peeping out of Marlenas purse.

"These are copies of the letters you haven't read yet. Here", Marlena handed few sheets of paper to Sami and smiled widely squinting her eyes. The mother didn't see the warm light emerging in her daughters eyes and didn't know to question why a pile of letters would have that effect on her.

"Thank you so much", Sami sighed and hid the papers in her purse, "Lucas doesn't understand why I want to read these. Have you and aunt Hope read them already?"

"No we haven't. She made me promise to wait for her. Julie will join us later too", Marlena explained.

"Why would you need to wait for aunt Hope? What's keeping her?" Sami questioned.

"Just a little trip to Ireland. She and Bo went to get your granpa Shawn back."

"Wait a minute", Sami raised her hands, "Back up a bit and explain it all."

Lucas was getting out of the car and he was still thinking about Carrie and all the other women in his life. The only constant in his life had been his mother and Lucas hated it. He amused himself with thinking different kinds of torture tactics as he bumped into someone.

"Roman? How did you get here so soon?"

"I had help", Roman said and looked down to his son-in-law. There was something in Lucas' behaviour Roman didn't like but he wasn't about to say anything. Sami had made her choice and she would have to live with it. They all would have to live with it. And after all, Lucas Roberts was lesser of two evils, Roman concluded the thought while thinking of the man he had left behind.

"What's that smirk about?" Lucas asked.

"Nothing. Let's go inside."


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter4**

That night Sami had trouble falling asleep. She was in another strange bed in another crappy room that wasn't her own. Nor was it Lucas'. Sami sighed and turned to face her husband. The man in question was sound to sleep and totally unaware of the close examination. His eyes were closed and his face was relaxed. His mouth was just a little bit open and his upper lip had been caught on his teeth so he looked little bit like a hamster. Sami had to grit her teeth and cover her mouth to hide the laughter bubling within her. Then suddenly Sami remembered how Lucas had looked when he was waking up from his coma. He had woken up begging her forgiveness and filled with determination to be a part of Wills life. It had taken time for Sami to get over Austin but after that she and Lucas had just circled in each others orbits long enough to start falling in love. Unfortunately they hadn't had the change to just love. Kate despised Sami and had made everything as difficult she could for them. Luckily it hadn't worked this time. Lucas had finally chosen her over his mother. Sami didn't understand where the tears came but suddenly her pillow was wet. Her head was starting to ache so she closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep.

Behind her closed eyelids Sami relived the moment she had shared with her mother earlier that day in the pub. _"It was EJ? EJ warned dad? Oh, let me guess, nothing happened and it was just a trick to get us out of that sleazy motel. Actually that's enough for me to write him a thank you note, almost." _Sami had raged and met her mothers peculiar look. That direct gaze reminded Sami of another look and suddenly she was staring into a pair of chocolate brown eyes.

Her eyes were wide open again. Sniffing at herself Sami got up and looked around her in this dark room. She spent a moment wondering how Lucas managed to feel at home everywhere he went. Sami needed more. Yes, she had her husband with her but still this place didn't feel comfortable enough for her. Sami took her purse and locked herself in the bathroom. After staring at her mirror image she decided that the only cure for this insomnia was another reading session. Sami hadn't had the time to read the letters before and she hadn't wanted to trouble Lucas to listen to them. Sami couldn't wait to read what had happened but at the same time she feared the moment she would read the last line. She took a deep breath and fell into another world and reached out to Santo through Colleen. After all she and her great-aunt looked alike and Colleen had experienced something unique. She had found her _anam cara, _her home.

_**A/N: I'm so sorry... I just noticed I had mixed up the chapters but they should be fixed now.**_


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

Sami had dozed off. She woke up sitting on the cold bathroom floor still crumpling her copies of the old letters. She had spent a long time reading how Santo had did his best to adjust to the limitations Colleen had set. Sami still smiled though her back was hurting, her great-aunt had been smart and sneaky in her own way. Santo must have been exceptionally charming if he had managed to mesmerise this young girl even thought she knew he was married with children. Sami got up slowly and washed her face. Again she found herself trying to find something that wasn't there in her mirror image. Why after all these years her own reflection haunted her? She closed her eyes trying to will away the budding headache which was sneaking in her brain. Facing the bluest gaze her own eyes could give Sami tried to see if others could see through her. She was so used to be juggling with so many lies that keeping her veils of deception folded had turned out to be more difficult than she had thought.

Behind the closed door Sami found Lucas sleeping still. She didn't see the feeling coming but when it had crept up on her Sami couldn't brush aside the dissatisfaction she was feeling. Being confined to a hidden place without the possibility for a normal life seemed to suit Lucas well. This time they spent hiding for her safety seemed to be the perfect excuse for Lucas not to find a job. Even being seven months pregnant wouldn't have stopped Sami. She thought to herself how much she would have preferred to be job hunting than locked up in this _safe house_.

"Are you sure?" Bo whispered and saw a short nod. Unfortunately he didn't trust the man doing the nodding one bit. He had to crawl few feet in dust to see better and to verify by his own eyes that he wasn't lied to. There were few cars on the parking lot apparently waiting for something.

"That's Andre", Bo couldn't help himself and almost ruined it all. The shock he had caused with those careless words was luckily silenced by Steve who had surprised them. Bo and Steve nodded to each other signalling that explanations would have to wait. This was a too delicate operation to be ruined with chatter. Everything was about timing and in that they succeeded. Unfortunately there always are few unpredictable variables and in this case those three variables hit their target with almost deathly accuracy. Steve and Bo knew that the explanations they had planned would not suffice this time.

"It's safe for us to go home?" Sami was baffled.

"Yes it is", Roman said smiling that crooked smile of his.

"Are you sure?" Lucas shouted from the bathroom sounding somewhat disappointed.

"I am. We got our man", Roman replied.

"What? Is Stefano in jail?" Sami cried out her shock. Roman furrowed:

"No, but Andre is."

"But Stefano is the one who needs the stem cells. It doesn't matter if Andre is in jail, as long as Stefano is loose Sami is in danger", Lucas yelled, "As long as any of the DiMeras are about she is in danger."

"I'm sure dad has thought about that", Sami said calmly reaching to touch his arm gently but he swung away from her, "I'm sure he'll arrange some sort of police protection for us just in case." His daughters leer made Roman flinch.

"Yes of course."


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Sami opened the curtains and leaned to look out of her kitchen window. Finally she was home and safe. Her father had arranged police officer to keep an eye on her and her family and with Andre behind bars they were one step closer to getting the DiMera's out of Salem. Lucas had decided that they needed to celebrate what had happened with a feast. Sami found herself smiling when she heard a gentle knock on the door. She went to open it and found her mother behind it.

"Hi mum, come on in", Sami said stepping aside to let Marlena in.

"Is Lucas home?" Marlena asked looking around her.

"No he went out to get something to eat. Why?" Sami saw that Marlena was contemplating what to tell her. Then she obviously decided to postpone what ever bad news she had and smiled widely handing Sami the next letter. Sami took the paper and looked at it in amazement. She asked:

"New one? This soon?" Marlena squinted and tried to evade:

"Not exactly. You forgot it and I decided to drop by to give it to you."

"Mum, what is wrong?"

"You know that Andre has been pretending to be Tony for two decades now. John and I are going to go and try to find the real Tony but I had to make sure you'll be all right before we leave." Sami didn't believe a word of what her mother was saying.

"Thank you for that mum but tell me what's really wrong." For the first time ever Marlena looked really old and tired. She sat down and took a deep breath before speaking.

"I have some really bad news and I really didn't want to tell you this but John said I should", Marlena stopped to bite her lip, "You know that you look exactly like Colleen. What you don't know is that you're not the only one with a look-alike across the time. Roman found a picture of Santo while he was arresting Bart and, gosh, you are going to hate this."

"What is it?" Sami went and sit next to her mother and waited.

"Santo looks exactly like EJ Wells."

"How is he?" Bo stopped the doctor rushing out of the hospital room.

"Critical." Was the short answer Bo and Steve heard.

"Is he going to live?" Steve asked looking somewhat concerned.

"Honestly, I don't know. Right now his chances are less than slim. Excuse me", the doctor said pushing the two men aside and ran across the hall to another room. Bo and Steve looked each other. Bo surprised himself by saying little prayer silently in his mind for the man fighting for his life. To justify the change of heart Bo thought of the fact that without this man, he would have had to watch his brother die. As if reading Bos mind Steve asked:

"Do you know where Roman is? I would think he'd be at least little bit interested was his life bought with another man's life."

"I don't know", Bo shook his head and saw something alarming in Steve, "What's wrong Steve?" Steve adjusted his patch and muttered:

"There's something familiar about this situation. It's like déjà vu."

"Sami, are you all right?" Marlena reached out to her daughter but it was years too late. Somewhere along the line Sami had learnt to deal with all the pains of her life alone and to hide them from her mother. By now the wall between was unsurmountable.

"Yes I am. You were right, I hate this. It feels more like fate every time I think about it and every time I read another letter but I hate to think that EJ and I are Santo and Colleen reincarnated."

"It's understandable darling. It really is", Marlena finally managed to grab and squeeze her daughters hand but she was the only one gaining strength from that touch. Sami was about to ask something when the door was opened and Lucas stepped in barely controlling himself:

"Sami! I've got some great news! I saw Roman at the town and he told me that EJ is knocking the hells gates. Oh Marlena, I didn't see you there."

"Hello Lucas. I was about to tell Sami about that", Marlena spoke calmly directing her words to Lucas, "Did Roman mention to you that EJ saved his life?"

"No", Lucas looked somewhat annoyed as he heard this detail.

"Must have slipped his mind", Marlena brushed off the lapse turning to her daughter again she said, "EJ took the bullets meant for Roman. He's in hospital now fighting for his life."


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"Bye! Have a safe trip!" Lucas shut the door behind his mother-in-law and turned to his wife ready to do the happy dance. His biggest competition was about to drop dead and give Lucas the freedom he yearned. Then he had a second thought. It would be unwise to show his hand at this time, he could afford to act concerned for a while and think about what he really wanted to do. Sami sat still on the couch frozen in shock. Lucas walked to her taking her hand in his and saying:

"I'm sorry honey, I really didn't had any idea that Roman had been in danger." When Sami didn't react to his words Lucas had an disturbing thought that she was concerned for EJ.

"I know what will make you feel better. I'll cook and we'll eat and enjoy ourselves. That should help you forget all this drabness." Sami nodded and gave him a small smile but didn't really answer. Only then did Lucas notice the translated letter in front of Sami.

"Did Marlena bring you this? Is this another episode of this dusty saga? Apparently it is. We'll read it after the dinner but I think you need to rest now", Lucas spoke as he buried the letter under some old magazines and went to get a blanket for Sami.When he got back, Sami finally opened her mouth to speak:

"Lucas I love you." Lucas couldn't help but grin:

"I love you too. Now sleep."

Sami did just that. She forced herself to lie down and sleep as Lucas went to the kitchen and started doing his magic. With all the clatter it was difficult to find peace long enough for her to sink into her hazy dreams but Sami made her best effort. Unfortunately for her the dreams she had were all too vivid to give her any rest. Sami dreamt of some past events and of some possibilities of future. She woke up screaming and Lucas had to perform a small miracle to save himself from burns.

"Sami! Wake up!" Lucas felt like slapping her but she opened her eyes before he had the chance. Reaching for a certain tone of concern Lucas spoke again:

"You were having a bad dream, do you remember what happened in it?" Sami grabbed Lucas' hands pre-empting his intentions to touch her forehead and face. She shook her head:

"No I don't remember." When Sami turned her gaze away from him Lucas knew she was lying. He wasn't about to let it go:

"You screamed:_ 'Don't go! You can't leave me here!' _Does that remind you of anything?" As Sami heard the words she had cried in her dream she saw the image associated to them: A man walking away from her breaking her heart into millions of little pieces just like she had done to him.

"No it doesn't. I can't remember", Sami lied again.

"You don't need to protect me Sami. What ever it is I can take it, after all I'm a man and it was only a dream", Lucas tried to encourage her to speak the truth but only managed to make her smile a sly smile:

"You still have your man badge then? Good, let's eat." She wouldn't hear any objections and succeeded in avoiding the subject the rest of the evening.

They ate and enjoyed each others company. Sami smiled and laughed but her laughter wasn't as bubbly as it had been. Her smile wasn't as nor were her thoughts as happy. She didn't forget Lucas' promise to read the letter and she even made him read it out loud for her. Sami hadn't realize that by giving the letter to Lucas and settling for listening his voice and tacky comments she would have more time to imagine the scenes in her head. Her plan to idle away backfired as this time she knew the what the main characters in the old love story looked like. Sami had to force her eyes open to erase the disturbing image from her mind. She looked at her husband and made a decision. Sami took control of the situation and seduced her husband which had never been too difficult for her to do. Something else proved to be impossible for her that night. Sami failed to cling to the moment to be able to enjoy the passion. She found herself drifting away and escaping far far away and when Lucas held her in his arms all she felt were the fetters keeping her still. She felt like a prisoner.


	9. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Sami couldn't sleep nor could she stay still. She kept trying to sit down and rest but she couldn't. Sami had thought Lucas to be asleep when she snuck out of their bed but he soon proved her wrong. He pranced out from the bedroom and laid his hands on her shoulders trying to massage her but she slipped away from him.

"What's wrong? Why aren't you in bed?" Lucas asked and looked genuinely worried.

"Nothing, I just can't sleep", Sami replied trying to think for an excuse, "I think it's that nap I took earlier."

"Do you think warm milk and some cookies might help you fall asleep?" Lucas offered.

"It might but I can get it for myself. Go to bed", Sami said.

"And let you burn the milk? No way. I don't want to smell that", Lucas said and went to the kitchen. Sami wrapped her arms around herself and squeezed. She could feel the bruises starting to form but she wouldn't let go.

"Here you are", Lucas returned with a cup of warm milk and a plate filled with cookies. Sami leaned against him turning her face away from him. She still had too much to hide.

"Thank you", she sipped her milk and took one chocolate chip cookie before saying, "Thank you Lucas. You are truly wonderful and I can't keep you up any longer. Go to bed and I'll follow when I've finished these." If he hadn't yawned at that exact moment his objections would have conquered but after seeing how tired he was, Sami became relentless. Once Lucas had returned to the bedroom Sami went to get her coat and keys and walked out through the door.

The halls were long and empty but Sami was used to finding her own way through them even in twilight. She was surprised to see her aunt Hope and uncle Bo sitting there and waiting. Sami almost gave in to the temptation of turning back before anyone saw her, instead she kept on walking and sat down next to Hope.

"Any news?"

"Sami, what are you doing here?" Hope whispered but it was too late. Bo had awoken.

"Sami?"

"I couldn't sleep and when mum told me that EJ saved dad's life, I just had to come." Hope nodded though she didn't really understand. Her inquisitive gaze made Sami blurt out:

"I may hate him but I don't want him dead", suddenly Sami could feel the flames on her skin again, "He used to be my friend and he is the father of my twins."

"EJ is in ICU. I'm waiting to see if he'll be able to testify against Andre and Bart", Bo said putting his arm around his wife. Hope instinctively leaned against him and their expressions glowed with happiness and love. Sami could see the love they had for each other in everything they did. A nurse walked to them.

"Detective Brady? You asked us to inform you once Mr. Wells would be awake. He is."

"Can I go and see him?" Bo asked. The nurse looked at them before saying:

"Only one visitor and only for five minutes."

"Uncle Bo, can I go?" Sami asked trying to stay calm as Bo stared at her, "I can ask him if he's able to testify but there's more what you can't ask him."

"And who are you?" the nurse asked before Bo could reply.

"I'm the mother of Mr. Wells twins, as you can see", Sami said touching her rounded belly. The nurse and Bo ended up nodding at the same time and Sami got up to follow her guide to EJ.

If she hadn't worked in a hospital years ago and if she hadn't come across with a similar sight before, Sami would have fainted at the door. There were more machines and tubes around him and going in and coming out of him than Sami could count. She walked to him and took EJs hand in hers. Sami could see the surprise in his eyes but he wasn't able the voice it because of intubation tube.

"Hi", Sami said ignoring the questions in his eyes, "Are you in pain?" It took a second for her to realize that EJ had no way to answer her.

"Blink twice for yes, once for no. Okay?" EJ blinked twice.

"Are you in pain?" He blinked once making her smile an agonized smile.

"Liar. Is it true that you saved my fathers life?" He wouldn't blink.

"This is no time for splitting hairs EJ, tell me did you take the bullets meant for my father." He closed his eyes for a longest moment only to open them again and to blink once.

"You did", Sami sighed bending down her head for a moment, "Thank you. Uncle Bo is waiting outside, he wants to know will you be able to testify." EJ blinked once.

"I guess that means you don't want to testify?" EJ blinked twice.

"They are family after all", Sami smiled in understanding until she remembered all the reasons she had for hating his family. She stayed silent until she figured out what EJ was begging to know with his eyes.

"I'm fine and so are the twins. Just concentrate on getting better", Sami saw the nurse in the corner of her eye, "I have to go now but I will be back." As soon as she had said the words EJ blinked, once. Sami wanted to stay and persuade him to change his mind but the nurse came closer ordering her to leave. Sami stepped back and reluctantly let go of his hand. She needed answers and he wouldn't be able to give them to her.


	10. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Her uncle Bo and aunt Hope were waiting outside. Sami felt uncontrollable anger but she calmed herself long enough to speak few words:

"What exactly happened? How did EJ got shot?"

"We had set Andre up. EJ agreed to help us when he was still under the impression that Andre was Tony and that he was a threat to you and your babies. Andre and Bart met few thugs and the situation got out of hand. EJ wasn't even supposed to be seen but he saw Andre pull a gun on Roman and went to stop him", Bo spoke slowly as if going through the situation once more in his head, "Did you ask EJ?"

"I did. He refuses to testify. Besides from the looks of it, it would take months before he would be able to walk into a courtroom and convince the judge of anything", Sami replied hiding her eyes in the deep shadows on her face.

"Sami, are you all right? It sounds like-" Hope started but didn't have the chance to finish.

"It sounds like what? Like I care?" Sami spat the words out of her mouth, "Of course I care. He was my friend and we are bound together because of these twins. He is their father."

"Don't forget that EJ raped you Sami. You can't carry the pain and hurt with you forever but you shouldn't forget what he did and trust him again either", Hope pointed out, "He's a DiMera Sami. After all that family has done to us, after all EJ has done to you, you shouldn't feel guilty for wanting him dead."

"But I don't want him dead. Yes there was a time I thought it would make my life easier if EJ were dead and I had a chance to watch him die, but I couldn't do it. I couldn't watch him die because I didn't want him dead", there was heat in Sami's voice and it was the kind of passion Hope nor Bo hadn't heard from her in a long time. Sami rubbed her temples and continued:

"Look, I know what it's like to be forgiven. For the sake of these babies I want to believe there's something good in him."

"He's a DiMera!" Bo said in a fit of pique.

"And I'm a Brady!" Sami cried, "Though how you have wished over the years that I wasn't and scorned over the things I've done, I still am a Brady. Somehow you found it in your hearts to forgive me. Doesn't EJ deserve forgiveness? He's been brought up by a twisted family and taught to believe in something so distorted that he shouldn't know right from wrong but he does. He regrets what he did to me and he turned against his own family to help you uncle Bo. EJ even saved my fathers life."

"Sami? Are you saying this because of the picture of Santo?" Hope asked still standing by her husband when Bo was still trying to digest what his niece had said.

"No. I don't know", Sami hesitated, "I just know that, that man in there, has more to him than his DiMera legacy. Sorry for my outburst. I need to get back home to Lucas."

"Of course, you need rest", Hope said and stepped to hug her.

"I'm really sorry about this fit of mine. I think it's just the stress after hearing that my father nearly died", Sami said while holding Hope. She took a step back and met the wise eyes of a Horton hoping for a promise of discretion.

"Go home to your husband Sami, there's nothing for you to worry here", Hope nodded. Sami smiled little and turned her eyes to her uncle.

"Are you staying here or going home?" she asked.

"I think we'll stay for a while", Bo said looking to his wife, "I want to see if the nurse changes her mind before Stefano finds out what has happened to his favourite son."

"Good night then", Sami said tilting her head and walking away.


	11. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

The next day Sami surprised her husband with a breakfast she hadn't cooked. She hadn't been able to fall asleep with EJs beaten face haunting her every time she tried to close her eyes. As soon as Lucas had devoured the breakfast, a phone call saved him from the clean-up.

"Sure Nick, we'll stop by the lab after Sami's appointment with doctor Stall", Lucas said before hanging up.

"What did Nick want?" Sami asked as she rinsed the cups.

"Something about the test results. Maybe we forgot to sign some form", Lucas suggested without even really thinking about it.

"Maybe", Sami just said though she was positive that couldn't be the case. She remembered going through all the papers and doctor Stall making sure she hadn't forgotten sign anything.

"Has your mother called?" Lucas shouted from the bedroom.

"No. Why do you ask?" Sami walked to the door and replied. She didn't feel like raising her voice.

"I was just curious, about Tony that is. Did they find him or not."

"I'm sure we'll know soon enough", Sami said letting her thoughts to wander to her mother. She had been quite mysterious after revealing that EJ had saved Romans life. Sami wondered was there something else her family was keeping from her.

"Are you ready to leave?" Lucas interrupted his wife's thoughts. Sami smiled and nodded.

"Thank you doctor", Sami said shaking doctor Stalls hand. She and Lucas escaped from the room and headed to the laboratory.

"What's wrong?" Sami asked as she saw Lucas grimacing.

"Nothing. Everything", was his vague answer.

"But everything was fine, just as it should be", Sami protested.

"Yes, everything was just as it should be with the twins. Everything except the paternity." Sami barely managed to hide her startled sigh. She was lost for words so she chose to grab her husbands arm and squeeze it in a way she hoped would prove her condolence. Sami regretted that she couldn't honestly feel sorry for Lucas. She had learnt to accept EJ as the father of her twins and Sami knew that he would be able to give their children so much more than she or Lucas could ever dream of giving them. And there was the fact that those twins would forever keep EJ in her life even if they would minimize the contact between adults.

"Lucas! Sami!" Nick came rushing to talk to them.

"Nick", Sami greeted, "You called. What did I forget to sign?"

"Thank you for coming but this isn't about a signature", the young man said.

"Then what is this about?" Lucas asked without expecting to hear the one thing that would turn his world upside down and bring his wife's plans crashing down.

Sami felt like she had been transported into a midnight club with lights flashing around her enabling her to see only short moments of what was going around her. It was like she was looking at pieces of a broken mirror and each piece told a incomplete part of a story. Sami saw her husbands face flashing from polite smile to a shock and then to glow of gloat. She saw the worry on Nicks face as he was waiting to hear the rebuke and blaming. She saw the light walls of the hospital turning to black as Lucas replaced EJ in the dreams she had dreamt for her twins. Sami could feel the corners of her mouth turning up and heard her voice die as she screamed for joy. She felt the heavy arms around her and found herself staring at the door of a hospital room. She didn't hear what Lucas said and didn't realize that he was heading to the ICU to tell EJ. All Sami felt were the tears drying in her eyes.


	12. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Few weeks later Sami couldn't stand it any more. She had sit tight letting Lucas and her family fuss around her while she was waiting for that last ray of hope. She hadn't seen it and her long wait for a word from EJ had been in vain. Sami finally broke and exploded in the middle of a nice dinner with Lucas and Will.

"I want out", Sami said and placed a small pice of cauliflower in her mouth.

"What?" The two Roberts men in her life said in unison.

"Will, I'm so sorry, could you take your plate to your room. I need to talk with your father", Sami said and sipped the milk she had in her glass.

"Are you two going to fight now?" Will asked refusing to move from his place.

"No. We are going to discuss", Sami said meeting her sons gaze.

"Sami, what are you talking about?" Lucas asked surprisingly calmly. Sami turned to talk to her husband for time being:

"Lucas, I don't love you. I want out. I want a divorce." She waited for her words to sink in and prepared herself for a storm of words. When it took longer than she had expected for him to react, Sami stood up and went to get her coat and walked out of door saying goodbye only to her son.

EJ had been moved out from ICU and Sami had to hunt him down. She found herself standing by his hospital room door looking in as he was getting dressed. His chest was still covered with bandages and his expression was anything but painless.

"Do you need help with those buttons?" she whispered and saw EJ look up. He shook his head.

"What are you doing here Samantha?" he asked with that voice of his. As cold as the tone was, his words still caressed her.

"I was waiting to hear from you. When I didn't, I decided to come to you."

"It's been over three weeks Samantha, since Lucas told me. Thank you for that by the way. He made it very clear that I no longer have any part in your live", Ej said and the dark shadows under his eyes just got darker.

"I was wrong. I was so wrong, please forgive me EJ", Sami said with a strained voice and desperation in her eyes.

"There is nothing to forgive between old friends Samantha", EJ said lowering his head again, "All your dreams finally came true. You have the husband you love and he is the father of your children. You are happy and you shouldn't feel the need to take part in my pain."

"That's not true EJ", Sami protested, "You saved my fathers life and after all I did to you, you kept me and my family safe."

"It was nothing Samantha", he said using her name again as he was saying goodbye to it, "Anyone would have done what I did, to save you and the babies. It was a small part of my atonement for my crimes", EJ replied concentrating in buttoning his shirt.

"No. No, no, no. EJ, no one has loved me like you love me except maybe John. Nothing I would do, could would turn him against me. Acceptance and unconditional love are something that scare me", Sami said reaching to EJ in spirit, "I've never been able to trust in that kind of love."

"You've settled and that has been your choice. You deserve so much more and you could get it all if you only dared to demand it", EJ replied slipping into his old character of being her friend. As soon as the words had died he closed up again and turned to search something from the side table.

"I don't have the right to demand anything, not after what I did. I'm asking EJ. Please forgive me. We can still be a family with these twins. I'll divorce Lucas and we can be together", Sami said grabbing his hands in hers.

"Why would you do that? Lucas makes you happy Samantha, you said so."

"No he doesn't", Sami said shaking her head again, "I was wrong. Please forgive me."

"What is this talk about forgiveness? What have you done that is so bad? What exactly do I need to forgive you? Samantha, I know you don't want to hear this and I know I shouldn't say this", EJ frowned and stopped to catch his breath, "I love you Samantha and nothing can change that. You are my first choice."

"I'm so sorry EJ, I'm so sorry", Sami felt the tears running down her face. She couldn't lie any more, she had to tell the truth. This would be the ultimate test of his love for her. Sami gulped.

"If anyone should apologize it's me-" EJ started but she stopped him by placing a finger on his lips. She looked up knowing that this would be the last time she would see the warm love in his eyes. Through the shroud of tears Sami stared at him and uttered:

"Don't. There's no need to you to apologize, ever. You haven't wronged me, I lied EJ. It wasn't rape. I knew it all along and I only said it to drive you away and to hold on to my family."

"You did what?" EJ asked with frightfully peaceful tone. Sami saw her fears to fulfil as his features froze and the love turned into a deep sadness in his eyes.

"I lied about the rape to test you and your love", she made herself tell the truth even though it meant letting go of him. EJ took a step back and met her gaze with a glare.

"You made me think that I had done the worst possible crime a man can do to a woman", he was still shaking his head trying to wrap his mind around what she had said.

"Yes."

"Samantha", as he said the name, Sami realized that for the first time all the tenderness that word had included was gone.

"Samantha, I may still love you but I don't have to like you. You did something worse I could have ever imagined. You betrayed me and everyone around you", EJ closed his eyes.

"Please EJ", she begged again.

"No Samantha I can't", he was shaking his head again, "This is too much, you crossed the line I didn't know was there. I still love you but I will get over you. You are still my first choice but I will settle for second best. You asked for forgiveness, you will have that within time but Samantha you wont have me." EJ grabbed his coat and walked past her to the door where Steve was waiting for him.

"EJ!" Sami turned and begged once more.

"You've made your choice Samantha, now you will have to live with it." And he was gone. Sami had just seen her dream come true. EJ had walked away from her breaking her heart into millions of pieces just like she had broken his. Sami cried and sank down to the floor holding tightly her belly.


	13. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

After she had been humiliated at the hospital, when she hadn't been able to get up from the floor without help and her face had been blotchy with tear marks, Sami returned home. She was surprised to find Lucas and Will there watching a DVD.

"Are you ready to have that discussion now?" Sami asked as she hung her coat.

"There's not going to be a discussion", Lucas replied without taking his eyes of the screen.

"Of course there is", Sami protested.

"No. I'm not letting you go", he just said finally reaching for the remote. Lucas whispered something to Will who quickly got up and removed himself from the room.

"What is this nonsense? Lucas, we are over. I don't love you." Sami was surprised to hear him laugh.

"And I don't love you but those twins are mine and I'm not letting them go. I'm not going to let you run after that DiMera bastard and raise my children with another man, not again. We will remain married", Lucas stated with crooked malicious grin on his face.

"You can't be serious", Sami had to sit as the shock hit her.

"But I am", Lucas replied and showed Sami the cold, manipulating side of himself. The pure hate on his face was something his son should never see.

"I own you bitch", Lucas said staring at her eyes, "I own you and I own those babies. If you try anything I will take Will and the twins away from you so fast that you wont know what hit you. No one and nothing can save you now my dear", Lucas said keeping his voice down and tone endearing. It was enough to scare Sami more than any of his yelled words could have.

Her first reaction had been to fight. Sami had wanted to expose Lucas for the abuser he really was and divorce him but then Sami had made the mistake to stop and think. She had considered the fact that after the truth about the rape would come out no one would trust or believe her any longer. Her family would abandon her and with Kate's support Lucas would surely take the twins from her. And now that EJ was gone Sami had lost the only friend she had have, the only man who could have saved her from this gilded gage she had wished for herself. Eric was too busy touring the world and keeping out of their family messes to care for Sami's little problems and Sami couldn't blame him. At least her twin brother had gotten out. Sami couldn't stop to feel sorry for herself, she had too much to do for her children, Kath and John. Lucas had picked the girls name and Sami had demanded to name the boy. Keeping herself busy was almost too easy for Sami to do but every now and then she stopped to sniff at herself. Without EJ she wouldn't have everything she had wanted for so long and without him she would have been able to enjoy this shell of a family life she had. Lucas had stopped trying to hide his numerous affairs few months after the twins were born and now even Will despised him for it and was moving out as soon as his school would allow it. Sometimes Sami would catch her eldest son staring at her with a question in his eyes: _"Why are you letting dad do this to you?"_ Sami brushed those looks and unspoken words off with the experience of living years in denial. Convincing herself of her own happiness was something much more difficult. The only times Sami felt content was when she was with her children and even then looking at the twins made her feel sweet sadness. _Why couldn't EJ be the father of her twins._


	14. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

There it was. Sami couldn't stop staring at it nor could she believe what she was seeing. She sat down carefully on the couch still her eyes fixed on the grainy picture. Sami would recognize those abbs anywhere. The fact that some cheap trashy magazine had hired paparazzi to stalk the famous race car driver EJ Wells who had returned to the top of his game after nearly being shot to death wasn't what had caused the shock. It was the person who's hands were covering those abbs, that upset her. Sami had seen variations of this picture before and the women EJ was with had always been stunning beauties but none of them had stayed by his side for long, not until now and this time her image scared Sami. The slender brunette had her hands all over EJ and he looked like he was enjoying himself. The minimal bikini couldn't hide her figure but the shades hid her ice blue gaze. Sami had seen her pictures before and apparently she was a famous, unmarried model in Europe but for how long. The caption implied that these two most popular celebrities in Europe were going to take the big leap to commitment. Neither of them usually wore any jewellery but few days earlier they had started wearing matching rings and though the rings weren't in their ring hand ring fingers, everyone were expecting the news of their engagement.

Sami had to concentrate. Inhale. Exhale. Deep breaths were the key against unconsciousness. She broke into hot passionate tears. Sami hadn't needed to read the whole story to know what was happening, EJ was finally moving on after all these months. He had found his second best and Sami had to wonder how long would she remain in his heart after this. Sami could imagine the headlines to come of EJs and Emilias fabulous wedding, the first pregnancy, birth of their child and perfect life. EJ would forever be happy with another. He would built a life without Sami and he would have everything he had ever wanted, everything EJ had once wanted with her.

Sami cried herself to sleep that night. Those were silent, burning tears which she was used to keeping from her husband. Not that he would have cared. Lucas hadn't been interested with Sami since she had found his latest mistress. She was getting all of his attention and Sami thanked her for it. Her life revolved around the twins and as much as Sami loved John and Kath, she needed more. Sami felt so lonely and disconnected. That was the loneliest night of her life and all the lonely images of others happiness haunted her through the dark hours. When Sami woke up, she had made her mind. It was time for a change. It was still early as she packed what she and the twins needed and she stepped outside of her apartment for the first time in a really long time. Sami made her way to Johns office and sat in front of the man she had spent years hating and confessed her sins. Sami begged for John to stay silent for a moment longer as she revealed the hell she was now living in and the reason why.

"Samantha Gene", John whispered after hours of listening.

"Please John", Sami wasn't finished yet, "I know I don't deserve it but please will you help me, for the twins. They deserve something better. I have an idea of how to take care of them but I can't do anything while I'm still married to Lucas. He would find a way to take it all from me and from our children." John got up from his chair and walked around his table. He pulled Sami up and in a tight embrace.

"Of course I will. I don't know how I'm going to explain this to your mother but of course I will."


	15. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

With John's support Sami continued to pretend for a while longer. Few weeks were all they needed to get enough evidence of Lucas cheating on Sami and to talk to a lawyer. The numbness Sami was accustomed to slowly disappeared and the last days of pretending to be something she had never really been brought her to tears every night. John had agreed to keep her secret until they had enough proof against Lucas and Sami had the last change to meet with her mother without fearing for her judgement.

As Marlena and Sami had lunch, Sami studied her mothers expressions and listened to her voice without the harsh tones. Marlena smiled and chatted about John, Belle and Claire. Sami confined herself to listening and nodding. She didn't realize how unlike her it was until her sunny mother pointed it out.

"Sami, what's wrong? You've hardly said a word. Is something wrong with the twins? What about Will? How is his school?"

"Will is fine and so are the twins. Kath and John are at aunt Hope's right now and I need to pick them up soon", Sami said tasting her drink.

"I know, you told me that earlier Sami. If it's not the kids then what is wrong? Is it Lucas?"

"No mother, it's not Lucas. It's me", Sami said playing with her glass for few seconds trying to search the words. She needed to tell the truth herself and face the consequences. Like EJ had said a year earlier, Sami had made her choice and she needed to live with it.

"Mum, I'm going to divorce Lucas."

"What? Why? But you two are so happy together and you have this perfect family", Marlena protested as invisible clouds shadowed her face.

"No mum, our family is anything but perfect. What you've seen this past year has been a elaborate lie. Lucas is cheating on me but that's not the reason why I'm divorcing him", Sami tried to explain but she knew it would take more than that to get through to her mother.

"Lucas is cheating on you? But with who? And if that's not the reason then what is?"

"I've lost count with his mistresses and I've wanted this longer than he's been cheating on me", Sami struggled to keep speaking the truth, "Mum, I don't love him. I feel nothing for Lucas, he's as irrelevant to me as he can be. Yes, he'll always be part of my life because of our children but personally I don't feel anything for him any more."

"You are lying my dear", Marlena tried.

"No I'm not. Do you want to know how I know that?", Sami waited to see her mother nod before she continued, "Because our marriage has been a one big lie from the start. I didn't get back together with Lucas because I loved him. I chose him because I wanted to give my son the family he's always wanted and because I was afraid of my feelings for another."

"Sami. What are you saying?" Marlena looked scared but Sami felt at peace.

"It's EJ mum. Since I met him, it's always been him."

"But Sami, he raped you! Forgive him but don't dream of a life with the man who hurt you." Sami felt actually surprised to see her mother care this much. She couldn't help but doubt that Marlena wasn't being totally honest but rather acting as she thought it was expected from her. Sami almost smiled a bitter smile when she revealed her sin:

"I cried rape because I was too afraid of losing and disappointing my family again. Do you remember that ridiculous award and how everyone kept saying that I've finally changed, grown up? Don't tell me you've forgotten."

"I remember", Marlena agreed looking gloomier by the minute.

"I guess you didn't realize how much it actually meant for me", Sami tasted her drink again, "You still didn't realize the pressure I was under and how much I wanted you to look at me like you look at Carrie and Belle. Just once, just once I wanted you to look at me like you were proud of me and like you loved me more than the others."

"Are you blaming me now?" Marlena managed to keep her voice under control.

"No I'm not. I'm just trying to explain how I felt", Sami said knowing what was to come next. Her mother shook her head:

"I don't believe what I'm hearing. You haven't changed Sami, not at all. You are still the same little manipulating wench you've always been. I don't know how you managed to convince my John of anything else but believe me, I will not be fooled again. And poor Lucas, what lies you speak of him!" Marlena had gotten up to her feet, "I wish that he'll win the custody of your children because you obviously haven't learnt enough of life to be their guardian. Now are you going to tell your father or will I have to?" Sami looked up and saw the disapproving lines around her mothers mouth. That foul expression didn't suit the esteemed doctor Marlena Evans at all. Sami nodded and was left to watch her mother walk away. Sami held back the tear and refused to be offended by her mothers actions. But the tears fell as she realized that this was only the beginning. One by one everyone in Salem would turn against her again.


	16. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Sami felt exhausted but she couldn't postpone her responsibilities any longer. She paid for the lunch and made herself as presentable as she could before heading to Bo's and Hope's. Sami didn't feel like telling Hope what she had just told her mother but Sami also knew that the truth wouldn't wait for long. She was walking to the house when she heard a familiar laugh and words which stopped her:

"Damn you EJ. You're not as funny as you think!" She shivered. The voice she heard was her uncle Steve's but Sami couldn't hear the other person talk. She peeked through the leaves and realized that Steve was talking to a cell phone. Sami knew she shouldn't eavesdrop but she couldn't move either. Holding her breath Sami waited to hear more. Steve laughed again.

"That's what I thought. So how's your better half?" Steve paused to hear the reply, "Good to hear. No, I don't think we have any plans for that day but I'll ask Kayla and call you back later. And congratulations, you deserve it." Sami became tense. What plans was Steve talking about? Sami remembered that Steve had been at the hospital to pick EJ up but she also remembered that EJ had made clear that he wouldn't be testifying against his family. Sami took a deep breath and made herself think calmly. She started remembering the rumours she had heard about Steve's and EJs hidden past together. Had the two men renewed their friendship? Was EJ calling Steve to make sure he was available on his wedding day? Sami lurched and gave herself away.

"Who's there?" Steve demanded to know. Sami took a deep breath and pieced herself back together before moving into his view.

"It's me uncle Steve, Sami. I was on my way to get the twins from aunt Hope."

"I can see that", Steve replied with a pensive tone and pierced her with his one-eyed gaze, "You didn't happen to overhear anything now did you?" Sami bit her lip and nodded:

"You were talking to EJ. Are you friends now?"

"We've been friends for a long time", Steve said still leering at her.

"But he tortured you!" Sami exclaimed.

"Did he now?" His reply was so faint that she didn't notice it.

"And aunt Kayla swore she wouldn't let EJ get away with all the things he did to you!"

"There's more to this than meets the eye, Sami. You of all people should know that", Steve's gentle but stern words made her drop her head in shame.

"You know what happened then?" He nodded to answer her question after she had raised her head again.

"Is he, is EJ, getting married?" Sami started her list of questions but Steve interrupted her:

"I don't think it's my place to tell you."

"I understand", Sami hesitated but tried once more, "Are you going to tell him about this conversation?" Steve just tilted his head and waited for her to get the message: Sami no longer had any place in EJs life.

"I have to go now. Give my regards to Kayla and Stephanie, will you", Sami said and waited Steve to nod. She wanted to stay and make the man tell her everything he knew about EJ and his current life but in the end reason won. Sami had more important things to do than long for an old flame. Sami took the steps to her aunts door and raised her hand to give a knock. She prepared herself for another battle and promised herself not to flinch. Her family deserved the truth.


	17. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

As Sami had know would happen, happened. Every member of her saintly family turned on her. Within days Sami had resumed her position as the town pariah. Sure some offered their sympathies and offered some understanding until they found out the motivation behind her actions. Sami hadn't had the courage to stand up for herself and she had tortured a man she loved only to test him and his love for her, to prove some meaningless point. He had passed her tests but he had also decided to move on and now she was alone again. Somehow Sami found the strength and the courage to walk on the streets with her head held up high. As much as she was hurting she refused to show it and she kept tears to herself. But something had changed. This time she took in the rebuke without lashing out in return. Sami bit her tongue and refused to point out all the mistakes others had made and never admitted. And this time someone fought for her.

John offered his support, both financial and spiritual, and listened to her even when he didn't like what he heard. John even opened his mouth to tell others to shut up and reminded them for their own mistakes if they kept badgering her even after she had admitted fault. And he wasn't the only one defending her. The lawyer John had found for Sami fought an ugly battle for her. When most of her family turned on Sami, Marie Willowstream found a way to turn it in her favour. Sami had finally learnt from her mistakes. She wanted Lucas to be part of their children's life regardless of the hurt he had caused her and she was willing to fight to make him see that. Even though Kate pulled every string she knew and called in favours for her son, Sami won. An unfaithful man who was satisfied with the job his mother had given him didn't convince the judge especially when he was up against a woman who had been through hell and still fought for what was best for her children and had managed to start a small business of her own. If that hadn't been enough, the testimony their first child, William gave, sealed the deal. Until the moment Will opened his mouth in the witness stand, Lucas believed that he'd finally have his revenge on Sami but his arrogant smirk faltered as Will explicitly told every dirty detail he knew about his father and his affairs.

Sami had embraced her firstborn after his father had scolded him for betraying him and the family name. Lucas hadn't realized that such childish tricks wouldn't work any more and that his son had finally grown up. Even though Will disapproved what his mother had done, he was willing to put it in the past and help her for the sake of his younger siblings. Will adored Kath and John and was as heartbroken as Sami was when Lucas for the first time forgot to pick the twins up. Will stayed home when Sami went to find Lucas and later on guessed what she found: A drunken fool sleeping of his hangover with an insignificant call girl. Every time Will heard his mother defend herself and her actions to his grandmother Kate, he felt a small piece of himself die since every time Sami's reasoning made more sense and the lousy excuses Wills father used crumbled under closer inspection. Just like his son, Kate refused to see that Will had matured and wasn't as gullible as he had been and the first time Will spoke back to her as an adult arguing his case, Kate was shocked. Sami was proud of her son when she saw him thinking for himself and telling few grim truths to his father and grandmother. However she had wanted to shield Will for these disappointments but she knew he wouldn't let her do that forever and it broke her heart.


	18. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

For the tenth time Sami made sure she had everything she needed with her before walking in to John's office at Basic Black. Sami was feeling nervous since so much depended on this meeting. Sami smiled as she remembered how John had suggested the idea of starting a business of her own to her. When Sami had gone back to Basic Black John had pushed her aside and told her to go through all the old discarded memos before destroying them and making sure nothing essential was lost. Sami had found herself in a forgotten dusty office filled with boxes of irrelevant papers and had gone to work. Quite quickly she had learnt to recognize the important papers and had lost herself in the business secrets. Then one night she had amused herself and written her first summary of a business plan. That first summary hadn't been her last and somehow one of her suggestions had slipped into a file Sami had forwarded to John for closer inspection. The next day John had summoned her and asked her what the paper was. Sami had immediately recognized her plan and apologized at the same offering time to destroy it along with the other trifling papers. John had stopped her and asked for an explanation. When Sami had explained that she had written the business plan to amuse herself, John praised her observations and told her to how, thanks to her, he would actually save a bundle just enforcing one single suggestion Sami had made. John had sent back to the same office with instructions to write another summary or a plan each day and return it to him. During the long weeks Sami had worked in that isolated office she had refined her wit and business sense until she was ready to take her stepfathers advice and start her own consulting firm. Right now Sami still worked exclusively for Basic Black but depending on this meeting she might start getting new clients if John would agree to recommend her to few other enterprisers. Sami made sure she had the warmest expression possible when she knocked on the door gently, opened the door and peeked in. John was there with some unknown suits and he welcomed Sami to join them by saying:

"And here is my secret weapon, Samantha Brady. She cleared a room for me and steered this company into a success we've never seen."

Later that night Sami returned home where Will was playing with his baby sister and brother. Sami stopped to look for a while and for the first time she had time to feel peace and deep sadness because the father of her children had forsaken them. Sami also felt a touch of emptiness. It was like a black hole in her soul reminding her of her mistakes and of the man she still loved with every fiber of her being. Sami missed EJ. She missed his touch though she never had really felt it and his calm, reassuring voice telling her that she could be anything and everything she wanted to be. Sami missed the strong shoulders she could lean on to and his patience when she had confessed every crime she had committed. Sami walked into her bedroom to change into something more comfortable. As she was undressing herself she remembered all the missed opportunities because of her silly fears. She tried to imagine his touch on her skin and warm, intense breaths on her neck as he would have helped her out of her clothes. Sami closed her eyes and could almost feel his touch running from her jawline down to her neck and over shoulder down her side to her waist. Then a sudden breath broke the spell and Sami was alone in her room again. She could hear her happy children playing in the other room and it made her transition from dream to reality even more dreadful.


	19. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Sami walked to the living room and found Will carrying Kath around the room.

"What are you doing?" Sami asked and made sure John was happy in his playpen.

"I'm looking for a letter great-grandma Caroline sent. She promised to give me some baby pictures of you and uncle Eric and me. I wanted to make a collage", Will spoke without interrupting his search.

"Do you remember where you saw it last?" Sami asked and grabbed the nearest pile of old magazines. Something fell to the floor and Sami knelt down to pick the envelope up. Before she could cry out her triumph, Sami realized that she was holding one of the original letters Santo had sent to Colleen. She fell back and sat down to a chair still clenching to the envelope. It had been over a year since Sami had had the time or the pleasure to drown herself in this old tragic romance of Colleen Brady and Santo DiMera. Sami could remember the sleepless nights she had spent dreaming of a love like her great-aunts and picturing the events described in their love letters. Sami remembered the moment her mother had told her of the likeness EJ shared with his grandfather. She had felt a fate crushing her under its grasp. Somehow past had reached through the old letters trying to tell Sami to correct the past mistakes before it would be too late but she had lost her chance long before reading those letters.

"Mum!", Wills voice brought her back to the present, "Did you find it?" Sami couldn't trust her voice to carry over the babbling children so she chose to simply shake her head and go through the magazine pile on her lap. Soon she wished she hadn't. The magazines she was holding, Sami had bought to find out more about EJs life in Europe regardless of the hurt seeing the pictures of him with another woman caused. There was that familiar picture from his yacht somewhere at the Mediterranean sea where EJ was sunbathing with Emilia. Another magazine had a detailed description and grainy pictures of the rings they were wearing along with an exclusive interview of the jeweller. Another magazine had a detailed expose on Emilias shady past in the Nordic nightclubs before and during her modelling career. Another issue had a similar expose on EJ but without any mention of the time he had spent in America and a town called Salem. Sami had read that story multiple times to make sure of that. One magazine was full of scoops their close friends had decided to share with the public but Sami's favourite issue was where EJ and Emilia had opened their home to the journalist and spent hours talking about their live, love and plans for the future. Sami had felt a sharp twinge every time she had read the part of the interview where EJ and Emilia talked about starting a family.

Between the lines Sami could read the love she had so foolishly thrown away as Emilia had teased EJ about wanting to have enough children for a soccer team of their own. Sami felt a lump forming in her throat as she once more read the words the interviewer had used to describe this extraordinarily ordinary couple. Sami found the man she still loved in the words which painted him as a charming and confident man with simple pleasures and goals in life. Still staring at the glossy paper and a picture of two beautiful people dressed only in white and with limbs tangled, laughing together and warm sun shining on them, Sami could see the spark in EJs eyes. Now Sami knew for sure that she had been replaced in EJs life and in his heart. That twinkle in his eyes had been reserved for her and her only but now another woman was lucky enough to see it. Someone else made him lit up and feel more alive. Someone else was brushing his bristly face and helping him shave his handsome face clean again. Someone else was burning his toast and making him laugh with the mess she had made. Someone else was confiding in him and basking in his admiration. Someone else was receiving the handkerchief he was offering for her to blot her tears in. Someone else was there for him and she wouldn't be foolish enough drive him away.


	20. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

Later that week Sami was again reminded of the fact that there are no such things as day offs for a single mother and a self-employed business woman. She was going to return to her apartment only to leave again and to spent few hours in the park flicking through her notes while Will would introduce Kath and John to the wonders of grass. Hopefully that way Sami would be able to dedicate the evening to her sweethearts. All her plans were undone as she saw three men walking across the street into a bar. Normally this wouldn't have been something worth stopping for, though all the men were handsome in their own way and worth ogling, but their identities made the situation extremely interesting and puzzling for Sami. _What were John Black and Steve Johnson doing with EJ Wells? And why were they walking into a bar this time of day? _It actually took the time to form these two thoughts for Sami to perceive the fact that EJ was back in town. EJ Wells, the love of Sami's life and her lost, best friend was back in Salem. And he was currently talking to her uncle Steve and stepfather in a bar across the street from Sami. She dropped her calendar in her bag and followed the men. It took some manoeuvring but Sami got herself a drink and a table barely within earshot from the three musketeers. She obviously had missed something hilarious since the men were laughing audibly. Then someone coughed and John spoke:

"If you had asked me a year ago, I would never have believed it!"

"Neither would have I", Steve agreed with him, "Maybe next time we should bring Bo with us and buy him a drink to say thank you." They guffawed and Sami decided that the joke she had missed was crucial in order to understand the last remark.

"So EJ, are you serious with these plans your?" John asked and from the tone Sami knew he had his brow arched. After a long silence Sami finally caught the last part of EJs reply:

"-we've been planning this step for ages. This is the time to act and if you have been listening to me, you'll agree with me." Sami felt her heart sank. EJ was going to marry Emilia. "_What about me?"_ she thought to herself and John must have been channelling her since he voiced the question for her:

"What about Sami?"

"What about her?" EJ and Steve spoke at the same time. Little later EJ added:

"Why do you ask John?" John spoke calmly:

"She's my daughter and she's been through a lot this past year. Don't you think she deserves to know what you are planning to do? Don't you think she deserves to hear it from you?"

"Why does she need to know at all?" Sami heard EJ ask.

"These things always come out", Steve said and Sami heard a glass meet the table.

"Steve is right. These things always come out in a way or another. It would be better if you told her now instead of later", John spoke on his turn. There was another silence before EJ spoke again:

"Samantha, she broke me. She made me fall in love with her, she took all that I gave her and chuck it all away. She chose Lucas and she ensured that choice with a most vicious lie ever told. She _broke_ me. Right up on till the moment when she confessed it to me, I thought that there was nothing she could do or say to drive me away from her. I still love her, a piece of me always will but I can't take it any more. I can't handle seeing her."

"Sami has changed a lot during these past months and I know she misses you", Sami heard John convincing EJ, "She spends a small fortune on those trashy magazines only to find out some titbit of you." Sami breathed. She hadn't realize she had been so transparent.

"I think she just misses a friend, someone to talk to, someone who wont judge her. She never really had a friend before I came to Salem."

"That's true but I really don't think that's all-"

"John please. Can we please leave the subject of Samantha? I didn't flew across the ocean to talk about her", EJ spoke with a cold and determined voice. When she heard him, Sami was gulping for air as the tears fell. She had to hide and fast before anyone would notice her. Sami snuck out of the bar and stopped for a moment to dry her eyes. Silently she decided that she wouldn't cry for EJ Wells ever again. Sami managed to take few steps before she remembered how different things had been at first and how she had been best friends with Prince Charming. Her eyes were watery again and she had to stop because she couldn't see where she was going. Then she heard someone calling her name.

"Samantha?" EJ had followed her.


	21. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

It was like time had stopped still. Sami felt her tears dry as she gazed the beautiful man few steps away from her. She didn't see the subtle signs of insecurity on his face or posture. All she saw was the friend who had deserted her when she had needed him the most.

"Samantha?" EJ said her name again but she didn't hear the light plea in his voice. She only heard the cold words he had spoken moments earlier in the bar. Sami didn't understand why she felt so betrayed when he had done everything for a very compelling reason. EJ hadn't acted on a whim. He had been forced to a breaking poit by her.

"Samantha?" It was the third time he used her name.

"Please, don't call me that", she said shaking her head trying not to remember when EJ had used her name to caress her. It was too painful for her to remember what couldn't be.

"You'll always be Samantha to me." His honest answer was almost too much for her.

"What does Emilia say about that?" Sami asked wanting to hurt him. She didn't realize that by bringing up that name would only hurt herself. EJ looked thoughtful as he chose his words:

"Emilia knows about you Samantha. She knows and she accepts the things she can't change."

"She's the better person then, in every possible way", Sami couldn't hide the bitterness in her voice but she could hide her eyes filled with remorse.

"Why do you say that Samantha? Emilia is far from perfect. She is selfish, demanding, brutally honest at times and a manipulative liar at other times, but she is also sweet, caring person with a generous heart-"

"Why are you telling me this?" Sami begged him to stop.

"You brought up the subject. I thought you wanted to understand."

"You thought I wanted to understand why you fell in love with her? You thought I wanted to hear how someone else took my place in your heart?" Sami cried in shock. EJ sighed:

"Samantha, I saw you leave the bar. I thought you might have heard my conversation with John and Steve and misunderstood something."

"There was nothing to misunderstand. _You didn't fly over the Atlantic to see me!_" she shot back at him the words he had used to inadvertently cut her.

"Damn I knew I shouldn't have come after you", he groused to himself. The change in him as EJ prepared to turn and walk back to the bar woke Sami up. This was her first chance after EJ had left to try and change his mind. This might be her the only chance she would ever have.

"I'm sorry!" Sami shouted after him succeeding in stopping him, "I'm so sorry EJ. It's just that, I've missed you." Sami waited wanting desperately EJ to look into her eyes and see just how much she meant it. He didn't look at her but his voice gave her new hope:

"Samantha, don't."

"I've been through a lot this past year. I suffered through the marriage I chose in my ignorance and I survived the divorce. I'm coping with the children and I'm managing my own business now. I'm living a good life, a better life I've ever lived but it's not enough. Everything reminds me of you. The music I listen, the tea I make, the absence of friends who wont judge me and the place I live in. I'm still waiting for you to come back to live across the hall from me", Sami confessed, "EJ, nothing hurts like knowing what could have been and remembering how I alone chose something else."

"Samantha, this isn't why I came after you. Don't talk like that-" EJ tried to stop her again but Sami didn't listen. She couldn't let herself listen because she knew that she needed all her courage to speak the words in her mind to him.

"Do you remember Colleen and Santo, our ancestors and look-alikes and their tragic romance?" Sami saw EJ nod slightly, "EJ I think we are Colleen and Santo reincarnated. Fate gave us another chance to make things right but I ruined it all."

"That's ridiculous Samantha", EJ was outraged.

"No it isn't just listen to me please", Samantha pleaded with him and kept on speaking, "You once said that we have a connection we can't deny because it hurts to deny it and I think you are right. We've always had that connection EJ. We are soul friends, you are my _anam cara._ EJ, you are the only one for me and I don't want to wait for another lifetime to be with you. I love you. Wont you please forgive me so we can be together in this life as well as in all the lives to come?"

EJ laughed. He didn't know what to say so he laughed. But when he saw her wounded expression he made himself stop. He opened his mouth to express his disbelief:

"Samantha, you can not be serious. You can't really believe in this nonsense?"

"I do, I do believe in it."

"Samantha, when I spoke of our connection, I was trying to get you leave Lucas and be with me. I was trying to steal you away from him", EJ confessed, "I said those things because I loved you and they were true because I loved you. We are our own people Samantha and fate has nothing to do with where we are now. I would think you have enough to mend in your own life, Samantha. You really shouldn't even consider correcting the mistakes others have made."

"Well if it's not fate, then what is it EJ? All I know is that I can't stop thinking of you and hoping that things would be different. I want you in my life and I want you in my children's lives." Sami took a step closer to him staring at him and hoping he would make all her dreams come true.

"It's just a memory of a feeling Samantha. You'll find it again too, with someone new. Just give in and move on with your life. Your children will thank you for it", EJ closed his eyes for a second and met her eyes with a cold glare, "I'll make sure you wont have to witness any more of my meetings with John and Steve. I wouldn't want you to overhear anything that might upset you again. Goodbye Samantha."

EJ had just made the impossible possible. He had made Sami feel worse and more hopeless than she had ever felt. EJ wanted her to move on and find a happiness with someone else like he had found with Emilia. As she watched him walk away, slipping away from her, Sami wanted to scream. She wanted to turn back the time and go back to the moment she had turned on EJ. Sami wanted to go back in time with the knowledge that nothing could ever replace the hole in her soul if she would let him go away and that nothing EJ or his family had done would ever be reason enough for her to move on. Sami wanted to let her younger self know that EJ was her destiny and that by hurting him she would only end up hurting herself. Sami desperately wanted to believe that she would have another chance. She didn't want to face the fact that it was too late.


	22. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

Sami didn't know what to do. She was completely lost. The piles of papers and job offers surrounded her. She had made quite an impact in the business circles of her small home town and now her reputation had preceded her. Several international companies were interested in her services.

"Knock knock, anyone home?" Sami raised her head from the table as she heard a familiar voice by the door.

"Marie? Come in, come in. I'm so sorry about this mess", Sami jolted up from her seat and headed to the kitchen, "Do you want something to drink?"

"No thank you. I just had a long lunch meeting with a client", Marie stopped by the table Sami had fled from moments earlier, "What are all these?"

"Work and more work. I don't know how am I supposed to handle all those clients", Sami said taking a gulp of water.

"Maybe you don't need to. You should prioritize or take on help." Sami stopped to watch her friend a little closer. Yes, she finally had a female friend after all these years. Marie had shown her loyalty in court and those long talks they had had during the custody battle and with the setting up of Sami's company, had finally lead to a friendship. Marie didn't really had time for a social life because of her work and ambition and was the perfect companion for heartbroken, single mother as Sami described herself.

Something had changed in Marie. Sami tilted her head and tried to pinpoint what had caused this odd sensation of misplacement.

"Marie, who did you say you had lunch with?" Sami asked still ogling at her friend.

"I didn't. Why do you ask?" Marie said skimming through few of the offers Sami had received.

"Because you're not in your suit. A low-cut top and a floating skirt looks more like an outfit for a date than for a work lunch", Sami stated. Marie leered at her with her dark eyes and smiled just a little.

"Maybe." Her tone was enough to turn Sami into a giddy teen girl mode:

"Who is he? What does he look like? How did you meet? What does he do? Have you kissed him already? When are you going to see him again?" Marie grabbed her hands and waited until Sami had to stop for breath:

"His name is Josh Graham. He is gorgeous, tanned hunk. We met on a charity dinner. No we haven't kissed. And I don't know when I'm going to see him again. I doubt he will want to after today since I bolted out of the restaurant when Will called. He sounded worried so, naturally I rushed over here to see what's wrong. Where's the young man and the twins?"

"Will took the twins to the penthouse for John and Marlena to look after them before he left for school. Why would you flee from a _gorgeous hunk_? Tell me, tell me everything", Sami almost jumped up and down again.

"Why are you suddenly so interested in my non-existent love life?" Marie was squinting, "Is it because you've had so little luck with yours lately?"

Sami's smile died as she thought back to the day EJ had walked away from her for the second time.

"You could say that", Sami sighed and found a place to sit between all the papers she had spread out on the couch, "I still miss him. I told it to him and he laugh at me and I still miss him." Marie came to sit next to her and squeezed her lightly:

"It can't be that bad." Her effort to cheer Sami up failed miserably.

"It is that bad. EJ could say and do anything and I'd still want him back. The worst bit is that all he wants, is to see me move on! Why should I? Why should I make it easy for him to move on with Emilia?"

"Maybe because it's the best thing _for you? _Sami, when was the last time you were on a date?" Marie asked.

"About two years ago with EJ. Before that? I can't even remember."

"Then that's what you should do. You should go on a date, it doesn't need to be anything serious", Marie said like it was settled.

"No Marie. I don't want anything serious or casual. I don't want to date. I want-", Sami had to stop as the full impact of the words she was about to say hit her, "I want what I can't have. I want EJ."

"I know you do", Marie hugged her again, "But sometimes what we want and what we need aren't the same thing. I came here because Will called. He was worried sick for you. I know you try to keep your problems from him but Sami, Will is grown enough to see that everything is not right. He however isn't grown enough to take care of his mother. Sami, you really need to start taking better care of yourself. You can't be the best possible mother for your children if you don't take care of yourself first."

"I hate when you are reasoning with me", Sami pouted, "I know have no way of winning an argument with you. I couldn't even win if you were wrong."

"I know, it's a gift", Marie smiled conceitedly.

"There's just one fatal flaw in your plan. There's no one to take me out", Sami pointed out but it was too early for her to celebrate.

"Did I mention that _the gorgeous hunk _has a twin?"

"You are kidding me!"

"Yes I am!" Sami punched Marie who laughed, "But he does have a brother who is almost as handsome."

"You are a bad, bad girl Marie Willowstream", Sami replied trying to hold on to her grave expression.

"Yes, I know that too. But isn't it about time you acted like a bad girl too Sami?"

_Isn't it indeed?_


	23. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

Sami grabbed the crimson lipstick trying to decide whether to use it or not. She didn't want to stop staring at her own reflection but it seemed inevitable. Sami had changed. She could still see the shadows of her old self but she also saw something new. Sami saw confidence and self-esteem in those blue eyes staring back at her. Yes there was the hurt and love present too, but for the first time there wasn't a hint of that desperate need of please others. Sami held her head little higher and admitting to herself that Marie was right. She desperately needed a night out. Sami painted her lips and slipped the lipstick in her pocket. She just might need it again later.

"I'm coming!"

"Where are we going?" Sami asked after sitting quietly for half an hour in Marie's car.

"It's a surprise. Don't look me like that", Marie replied without even turning to see her, "This should be a fun night out. Forget your responsibilities for a while." Sami hid the small smile forcing it's way on her face. Marie knew her so well, almost as well as _he _did Sami shook her head to rid her mind of the image:

"I know but it's easier said than done."

"Sami, I know you've had the worst luck with men lately. I was there when your marriage to Lucas was ripped apart and I've heard everything possible about this god amongst men called EJ, who decided to cast you aside only moments after swearing differently. Honestly I don't know what you still see in him but I do think that you should give the opposite sex another chance."

"Lately is an understatement and I gave EJ reason after another to walk away", Sami had to put in.

"Sami, don't you dare to start defend that man to me again!" Sami jumped in her seat when she heard Marie's reaction, "Maybe he had a right but it doesn't change the fact that he broke his word to you."

"Duly noted, I wont say another word about him", Sami replied, "at least not today."

"Good. Now about your date-" Marie started.

"Yes _the gorgeous hunk!_" Sami had to laugh when she remembered Marie's description.

"No, the hunk is mine. You'll get _the Adonis_", Marie cut in and they started giggling like little girls.

"Thank god you weren't lying!" Sami said as she gazed the two men walking across the burning sand to them. When Marie didn't answer Sami glimpsed at her friend and leaned little closer to whisper to her:

"Do I need to get you a drool bucket?" Immediately after hearing the warning Marie's gaping mouth closed and her teeth were clenched. Marie relaxed her jaws just enough to say:

"The one on the left is Aaron, Josh's big brother. Apparently they paid their way through law school with modelling."

"Really?!" Sami said with a flicker of honest interest in her voice and she had to add, "Nude?"

"I can only wish", Marie whispered and locked eyes with Josh. Sami saw her friend hesitate but when the younger brother hastened her steps, Marie started to glow and took few steps forward. Soon Sami found herself smiling sheepishly to Aaron as Josh and Marie embraced.

"Oh I'm sorry, I almost forgot to introduce you", Marie blurted after reluctantly releasing Josh. Marie grabbed Sami's hand and pulled her closer as she made the formal introduction. Sami felt her friend shiver and decided to summon the bad girl within her to save the day.

"Shall we move indoors right away or later?" her words were complemented with a knowing smile and arching brow but thankfully Aaron understood the joke.

"There's a nice restaurant close by. We can go there", he bowed to Sami and reached his hand, "Shall we?" Sami happily deserted her friend and changed Marie's hand to his. They took the first wobbly steps to the parking lot before Aaron scooped Sami up in his arms and carried her to safety. Sami laughed.

After the quick and light meal the quartet ended up dancing in a night club. The blond and muscular man was a divine creature on the dance floor and Sami had to try her best to keep up with Aaron. She couldn't remember the last time she had had this much fun as they made everyone else around them sigh in envy. Marie and Josh had tried to keep up the conversation and had chose to find a secluded place to sit though Sami had her doubts about the talking. She laughed out loud as Aaron lifted her high above the others and then the music changed. Slowly Aaron brought her down and held her close as the languid music lead their steps. He never broke the eye contact and Sami found herself thinking of Austin. For the first time Sami _knew _for absolute certainty how it must have felt for Austin to dance with her, with the wrong sister. Austin had wanted to be with Carrie when they had tangoed that summer years ago. Thinking of that tango made Sami think of EJ again and how right it had felt to dance with him. Sami remembered the promise she had made to Marie and felt her features ease to a doleful smile.

"Is something wrong?" Aaron whispered with a concerned expression on his face. Sami shook her head and tried to concentrate.

"No, just a memory of another life time."

"Of another man?" Aaron asked knowingly.

"Yes, of another man too", Sami confirmed his suspicions.

"Anything serious?" She flashed her most stunning smile and replied:

"A life time commitment. He's actually waiting me to return home to read a story for him." When Aaron looked perplexed, Sami enlightened him:

"He and his sister are waiting for me to pick them up from their grandparents place."

"You are a single mother?" Aaron was shocked and when Sami nodded he replied, "You don't look old enough to have children." Sami had to laugh.

"My eldest son is nearly an adult and before you ask, yes, I was a teen when I had him. Can we go and find Marie and Josh now?"

Josh and Aaron drove Sami and Marie back to their car and thanked them for a delightful evening. Sami and Aaron tried to stay invisible as Marie and Josh said their goodbyes. Sami thanked Aaron for taking her mind of her responsibilities and wished him good luck with his career. Sami decisively rejected all his attempts to ask her out again or even exchange phone numbers. Sami had enjoyed the night out but she also knew that Aaron wasn't the man for her nor was she the woman for him. However things looked much brighter for their companions. Sami listened as Marie gushed the drive back to Salem about Josh and wished that she too would someday be able to feel such passion again.


	24. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

It was strange to return home that night. Sami had known that there wouldn't be anyone waiting for her since her children were with their grandparents but still the loneliness of the empty apartment devastated her. Sami stopped to look around and suddenly she realized that this place didn't really feel like home to her. For years she had live there and for years she had called the apartment home but it didn't feel right to use that word any more. Before Sami could think back to when this had changed the phone rang and she went to answer it.

"Hello?"

"Sami? Oh good you are home. I tried to call your lawyer friend but she didn't pick up."

"Mum, calm down", Sami had to cut in, "Tell me what's wrong and why would you need to talk to Marie?" Sami heard Marlena take a deep breath and start again:

"Lucas showed up with his lawyer demanding to see the kids and claiming that you have been keeping him from them. They ambushed me and when I tried to call Marie since she knows all details, his lawyer handed me court order demanding me to let the twins go with Lucas."

"So Lucas has the twins?" Sami made herself stay calm looking for her cell phone and Marie's number, "What about Will? Where is Will?"

"Sami I don't know. He snuck out after John left before Lucas came for the twins."

"John wasn't there? Mum, where was he? He promised me!"

"Don't you yell at me young woman", Marlena snorted, "He got a call and had to step out for a while. I guess Will heard the phone call and followed him since I found a note saying that's what he did."

"Mum how could you!" Sami cried, "Never mind, stay there. I'm coming over there with Marie. We need to find out where Lucas took the twins and did he really had the right to do it. Then mother, we are going to have a long discussion." Sami felt like slamming down the phone but restrained herself and simply hung up. Just then Marie answered her phone.

"Marie, listen, we've got a big problem!"

An hour later Sami and Marie had made their way to the penthouse and found Marlena waiting them alone. Marie had confirmed the legitimacy of the court order and informed astonished Sami and her mother that Lucas was now suing for full custody and claiming that Sami was a bad mother who only cared about her work and partying every night.

"But he was the one cheating on me since the twins were born!" Sami had to resort to shouting.

"I know", Marie replied.

"And he was the one who forgot to pick up the twins!"

"I know", Marie repeated trying to control her own anger.

"He was the one who I found drunk, sleeping it off with two call girls!"

"Sami I know. You need to stay calm", Marie was just speaking and trying to think of something constructive, "I'm trying to get hold off the judge who signed the court order and explain our side. Maybe I can get him to retract the order."

"He must have known. Lucas must have know we were planning to spent this night out together. He planned this but how did he find out?" Sami thought out loud.

"You never told me Lucas cheated on you", Marlena bemoaned.

"That's because when I first tried you wouldn't listen", Sami snapped at her and managed to make her mother jump back. Sami rubbed her temples and mumbled:

"I'm sorry mum, I'm just worried about the twins. I only brought them here because John promised to look after them."

"Are you saying that you don't trust in your own mother?" Marlena gasped.

"I'm saying, I trust in you as much as you trust in me", Sami glared at Marlena and turned her head away, "He didn't even take their things, mum. Couldn't you have at least done that? Couldn't you have made sure Lucas had everything Kath and Johnny need?" Marlena pouted refusing to answer and walked away to the kitchen. Sami watched her mother go and glimpsed at Marie hoping for good new.

"Nothing yet, but I'll keep trying." Sami nodded. Her heart was tearing apart but she didn't have the option to crumble. There was no one to take over for her and make sure her children were found and brought home.

Someone knocked on the door. Sami and Marie bolted to the door at the same time but Marie was quicker. She opened the door for Sami who came face to face with her eldest son.

"Will! Where have you been? Is that blood?!"

"Mum calm down", Will said fending of the hands tearing his stained shirt apart, "It's not my blood. It's granpa Johns. He's at the hospital!"

"What?!" They heard a glass breaking cry from the kitchen as Marlena realized her husband had snuck out to danger.

"Will you need to tell us everything", Sami demanded holding her son still when Marlena tried to attack them wanting to know more of John's condition.

"Mum where are the twins?" Will just asked. Sami was shaking her head:

"Your father has them, I'll explain later, now tell me what happened."

"I heard granpa John answer the phone and leave in a hurry and I decided to follow him."

"Why would you do such a thing? Why would he do such a thing" Marlena wailed.

"Mother please! Don't interrupt him. Will, go on", Sami nodded and listened.

"It was something I overheard. I went after him to find out if I was right and I was. John went to the docks to meet with your uncle Steve and EJ", Will saw her mother turn pale but kept talking, "They were about to meet someone when they suddenly scattered and I saw someone sneak up on granpa John. They stabbed him and granpa fell but luckily Steve was there to pick him up and I went to help him. EJ came after us and told us that he had left a nice packet for the Salem PD and that we should hurry. Then he drove us to the hospital in record time."

"Then what?"

"Then they sent me home and took granpa John in to the hospital. I'm guessing they are waiting for the news from the doctor before they call ganma Marlena", Will nodded to his grandmother. Just then the phone rang and Marlena went to answer it. She signalled that it was indeed Steve calling about John. Sami made her mind up quickly.

"Will, I want you to stay here with Marie or go with her if she needs to leave. I want you to call me the second you hear anything about the twins. I'm going to the hospital with my granma Marlena."

"Sure mum", Will agreed, "Mum?"

"What Will?" Sami turned to look at her son once more before walking out of the penthouse.

"I want to learn to drive like EJ does."


	25. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

Sami drove and Marlena jumped out of the car as soon as they reached the hospital. While Sami parked the car her mother had tracked down Steve and moved on to harass the incompetent doctors. Sami stood back and stopped a nurse who was trying to avoid the raving Mrs Black. The nurse was happy to tell Sami everything she knew about John's condition, which wasn't much but it was enough to convince her of his survival. Sami saw Steve who was standing back and in a way enjoying the sight of grown man squirming under Marlenas interrogation.

"What happened?" Sami whispered because she didn't want to distract her mother.

"A little accident, nothing more", Steve replied now grinning at the anguished doctor.

"John was stabbed and you call that a little accident? What is wrong with you and where is EJ?" Sami asked. She was angry enough to get Steve's attention:

"How do you know about EJ?"

"Will told me", Sami frowned, "He also told me that he wants to learn to drive like EJ."

"That kid doesn't have brains", Steve shook his head, "Driving like Wells does, can only get him killed."

"Steve!" Sami raised her voice but not enough for Marlena to hear.

"Yeah, we asked Will to keep quiet about EJ too. No one should know he was here tonight. EJ jumped on a plane and is somewhere over the Atlantic by now."

"You are lying. EJ wouldn't just leave!" This time her voice was high enough to make the doctor and Marlena leer at them.

"Are you saying that because you desperately want to see him?" Steve asked and Sami decided to divert his thought pattern:

"Lucas stole my twins tonight. I have more important things to think about. The only man who has been supporting me through my divorce is lying helpless in a hospital when I need him and his help the most. I have no one to turn to. What are you doing?"

"I'm dialling", Steve replied stating the obvious.

"Whom to?" Sami asked but the one eyed glance she got back was enough to shut her up.

"I'm going to make all your dreams come true."

Fifteen minutes after Steve had made the call a tall man walked into the hospital. He kept his face hidden and moved trying to be unnoticeable. Unfortunately for him, that was a task doomed to failure.

"Samantha? Steve?"

"I you wouldn't just fly away", Sami mumbled more to herself than to anyone else.

"Glad you got back in time", Steve replied watching around them and trying to make sure no one actually saw them together, "Our plans just failed."

"What?!" Sami didn't know how to react to the shock she heard in EJs voice.

"Lucas escaped with Sami's twins", Steve explained without clarifying anything to Sami.

"Samantha, are you all right?" Sami liked hearing the concern in his voice.

"I'm fine. Kath and Johnny were with my mother when Lucas and his lawyer ambushed them. They forced my mother to give the twins to Lucas", Sami said trying to read EJs reaction. His face went blank as he turned to look at Steve. Steve nodded and there was a silent understanding between them.

"Take care Samantha, I hope you'll find your children soon and unharmed", EJ nodded and the two men took the first steps away from her.

"Where are you going?" Sami asked, "You are going to go and find Lucas aren't you? I'm coming with you and don't even try to stop me!" She heard a deep sigh. Then EJ stopped Steve before could he say anything. If Sami hadn't known for sure that EJ now loved another woman, she would could have sworn to have seen an expression of pride and love on his face.


	26. Chapter 25

**_A/N So Steve was funny to all? most of you? Good, I'm terrible at writing anything comical for others since my own sense of humour is so odd. Writing this chapter was a bit more difficult than writing anything with EJ in it usually is. I really shouldn't go away for a long weekend when I'm in the middle of a story..._**

**_Last week I got a pleasant surprise. MissD had made a trailer with ThreeDs help for this fic and it's the first montage she has made for EJami. I would like to ask everyone to watch it and leave an encouraging comment for her if you haven't done so already. She has a talent that shouldn't be wasted (and no, I don't mean a drunken gift). You can find the trailer at Youtube by searching with words Anam Cara Trailer. _**

_**Thank you for reading everyone!**_

**Chapter 25**

It was pitch-black and Sami couldn't see anything. She was sitting in the back seat in the car while EJ and Steve were discussing what to do next.  
"I'm going to walk around the area and see what I can find. You'll stay here with her and keep an eye on that trailer", EJ said reaching to the door.  
"I'll do that", Steve stopped him and nodded to Sami, "I think it's better if you'll stay and keep her safe." Sami expected to hear an objection but witnessed only a silent capitulation. Steve stepped out of the car and closed the door as quietly as possible. EJ took his night sight binoculars and stared through them into the distance. Sami didn't realize she was biting her lip until she tasted blood in her mouth. He was so close and yet so far. 

"Do you wan to tell me what is this all about?" she asked finally.  
"I don't", he said still avoiding her gaze.  
"Tell me anyway." He snorted as he heard her request.  
"They were right, these things always come out in a way or another", EJ paused and lowered the binoculars, "I stumbled on a smugglers ring. I asked John and Steve to help. We've been tracking them for few months now and tonight was supposed to be the clean end to that particular scheme."  
"Why did Steve say that your plans failed after I told him about Lucas and the twins? Is Lucas involved?!"  
"Samantha please, keep your voice down", EJ finally turned to look at her, "Yes, Lucas is involved."  
"What are they smuggling?" Sami asked with a trembling voice.  
"The less you know, the safer you'll be Samantha", EJ replied turning to watch into the darkness again. Sami wasn't about to give up.  
"Lucas has my babies. I need to know what he's gotten himself into." EJ took a deep breath.  
"Drugs."  
"Drugs!" Sami screamed instinctively, "And you've known this for months! Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't John tell me? I'm the mother of those twins and I need to know if they are endangered by their father!"  
"Samantha!" his stern tone calmed her, "I didn't know that Lucas was involved until recently and by then", he stopped and Sami thought she saw pity in his eyes, "by then Lucas was no longer actively involved with the twins. John assured me of that."

Sami took deep breaths. She didn't know what to think. She was worried about her children but just knowing that EJ was helping her to find them, was enough to reassure her.  
"Why are you doing this?" she asked. EJ remained silent refusing to asnwer, "Are you doing this to get back at Lucas? Are you doing this for-"  
"There's no reason for me to get back at Lucas. I'm just doing the society a small favour. And no, I'm not doing this for you", he had interrupted her and spoken quickly like reciting a mantra. Sami wanted more details than he was giving her:  
"If you are not doing this for me, then why are you? Why did you come back and risk exposure if it wasn't for me? Why are you helping me to find Kath and Johnny?" Slowly EJ turned to look at her once again. He waited for her to meet his gaze before saying slowly:  
"Because I love them. I love Kath and Johnny as they were my blood, my own children. A piece of paper telling me that there isn't a biological connection between me and those twins isn't, never was, enough to squash my love for them." When he was sure that she had understood him, EJ turned to look out into the distance again. Sami was shaking. Ever since she had learnt that Lucas, not EJ, was the father of her twins she had wished to change it. During those long lonely nights while waiting for Lucas to return home from the arms of one of his mistresses, Sami had dreamed of an alternative universe where her children would be EJs and where they would be together. She and EJ would have a happy family, lovely home and caring friends. Now, EJ had crushed that dream by practically announcing that even if the twins had been his, it wouldn't have been enough for him to forgive her and overlook the lie she told. EJ loved the twins in spite of their true paternity but had still walked away from her. Sami felt a tear running down her face. She wiped it away quickly before EJ had to chance to notice her crying.

"They are beautiful children Samantha", EJ said suddenly, "I've been visiting them at the penthouse when ever I was in town. In case you were wondering, it was never planned. If Marlena wasn't home we met at the penthouse and by coincidence those were the times you preferred to let John spent time with the twins. I was planning to stop before they could tell you about me." Sami was shaking her head and fighting back the tears:  
"If you want it, you should keep on seeing them. EJ, I want you to be part of their lives even if you wont be part of mine." Their gazes met in the rear-view mirror. Sami thought that he was about to say something before Steve returned and interrupted them.  
"I was right. Lucas is in one of those trailers. I heard the twins cry while he was arguing with his lawyer", Steve smirked, "It sounded like a lovers quarrel to me."  
"If she'll have him, he'll sleep with her", Sami replied with a jaded tone.  
"She was a he", Steve said waiting for a some kind of reaction. Sami disappointed him by saying:  
"Lucas has a new lawyer? Mum didn't say anything." EJ spoke trying to keep the corners of his mouth steady:  
"We need a plan."


	27. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

"Are you sure that there's no one else there?" EJ asked for the second time.

"This isn't Glasgow man! Ask me once more and I'll let the girl go in first!" Steve replied.

"You wouldn't dare! Don't give her any ideas."

"I think it's too late", Steve replied.

"What do you mean?" EJ asked while checking his gun.

"Look, Sami is at the trailer already."

"Damn!"

Sami was banging on the trailer door.

"Lucas! Let me in! I know you are in there! Lucas!"

"Who the hell do you think you are?" A strange man came to open the door. He tried to block her view in but Sami was quick enough to catch a glimpse of Johnny.

"I'm the mother of the twins you helped my ex-husband to kidnap. Nice to meet you but I'd rather meet you in the court than in here. Why are you handling guns around my children?" Sami spoke without stopping to breathe overwhelming the inexperience man and sneaking into the trailer. The door was closed behind her as Steve and EJ were only taking their places around the trailer. They decided to wait and listen since they could still hear Sami's voice and accusations.

"You little coward! How do you dare to attack my mother like that? Why didn't you come to me?" Sami spoke at Lucas who was holding Kath, "And is this weasel your new lawyer? Marie will enjoy destroying him in court."

"Marie? As in Marie Willowstream?" the weasel cried out, "You didn't tell me her lawyer is _the _Marie Willowstream. No wonder your previous attorney quit!"

"I see he does have more than one braincell. Well done Lucas. Now give me my children!" Lucas scoffed:

"Your children Sami! Always yours, never mine!"

"What on earth are you saying Lucas? Can't you see Kath and Johnny are scared. You need to give them to me so I can take them home. We can discuss about your visitations tomorrow with our lawyers and a judge."

"So you can claim that I've hit them like you claimed I hit Will? No way Sami! I'm not falling for that trap any more", Lucas squeezed Kath little tighter and Sami grew more anxious.

"You know I wouldn't do that. During the custody hearing I made sure you'd be part of the twins lives. I didn't ask for full custody though Marie suggested it", Sami shot back and blocked the weasel lawyer from approaching Johnny, "Besides, remember when Will was small, I made sure you'll always have a special place in his life. I know I should have told you that you were the father and not Austin but I've learnt from that mistake-"

"Have you? Have you really?" Something odd was gleaming in Lucas' eyes as he interrupted her. That was the first time Sami saw the knife.

"No! Lucas, put the knife down!" Sami begged.

"Why should I? This kid is nothing to me. You've made sure of that!" Lucas sounded defiant.

"You are her father. Lucas, Kath is your baby girl. She is our baby girl, please don't hurt her. She loves you, Lucas!"

"No she's not. You've kept her from me. All this time you've prevented me from seeing Kath and Johnny."

"No Lucas. I want you to be a father to our children but they don't need to see you drunk. Lucas, you are sick and you need help. Don't you remember how you almost killed Will?" Sami begged. The blade was too close to Kath. Lucas was shaking his head.

"You ruined it Sami. You always ruin thing. Why did you do it? Why?!"

"I don't understand what you are saying!" Sami had tried to stay calm but the cry escaped from her lips.

"Do you know how much I wanted a little girl? Do you Sami? I wanted a small princess to pamper and you had to spoil it all for me!" Lucas moved the blade and Sami froze, "If I can't have her no one can!"

"Lucas no!" Sami cried but it was too late. Lucas was cutting Kaths throat as a menacing voice stopped him.

"Drop that knife or die." Steve had broken into the trailer and sneaked behind Lucas. Sami ran to Kath and tried to stop the bleeding. Behind her she heard the window crash as EJ knocked out Lucas' accomplice and shielded Johnny from any harm. Steve was tying up Lucas as EJ called for help and Sami was crying hysterically. Her fingers were covered in Kaths blood. EJ came next to her and gently removed Sami's hands from Kath and covered the cut with a small rolled-up towel. EJ spoke calmly trying to soothe both babies and their mother at the same time:

"Everything is going to be alright. Samantha, Kath will be alright!" Sami almost believed him.


	28. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

Sami and EJ were waiting outside the operating room while the doctors tended to Kaths wound. Sami sighed and buried her head in her hands. So much had happened in one day. She had been on a date with a gorgeous man she wasn't really interested in for the fist time in years and the man she wanted was no by her side, holding her baby boy and waiting with her to hear some news about her other baby. Sami couldn't believe Lucas had been malicious enough to hurt their little baby girl. How could he have acted like she meant nothing to him? Lucas was their father and he acted like the twins meant nothing to him. When she heard fast footsteps she dried her face with her sleeve.

"Mum?!

"Sami?" Marie and Will had found their way to the hospital. Will ran to EJ to take Johnny from him but the baby was reluctant to leave EJs warm arms. Johnny started crying but EJ calmed him within seconds. Will took a step back and nodded approvingly.

Marie had thrown her arms around Sami willing her to draw strength from her friend.

"What happened?" The question was pronounced with a young man's firm voice. EJ glimpsed at Sami before replying to Will:

"We found Lucas and the twins at the trailer park. Your mother went in to talk Lucas down and into giving up the twins to her. He had a knife and before I or Steve could stop him, there was a little accident. The doctors are inside taking care of your sister." Will nodded. He was silently filling in the blanks EJ had left. Will could imagine her mother rushing into danger without stopping to think about her own safety and Will could imagine his own father wanting to hurt his little sister intentionally.

"Where's Steve?" Marie asked.

"He stayed with Lucas and the weas- sorry, the with the lawyer as the cops took them in."

"I can't believe Lucas did this. I can't believe he would hurt his own daughter", Marie sighed, "I always thought him to be too much of a coward. Big words and verbal abuse but nothing physical."

"Mum could have kicked his ass any day", Will cut in.

"So could have you", Marie pointed out with a faint smile.

"I wish I had!"

"No Will. Violence doesn't solve anything. It's the reason your sister is being stitched up. She's going to have a nasty scar for the rest of her life and that's the case if we are lucky!" Sami had jumped out of her seat pushing Marie back and intimidating her first born child.

"Mum?" Will whispered because he could see that she was about to fall apart. Sami didn't move. She kept staring at Will with glazed eyes.

"Samantha?" It was the only sound in the world that could wake her. EJ called her name again with the soft tone. In that one word Sami heard once more all the trust, love and acceptance she had lost. She turned to look at EJ who was still holding the sleeping baby in his arms. Neither of them noticed the disapproving glare Marie was giving them nor the cautiously optimistic look Will had on his face.

Another interruption came in the form of Steve striding along the corridor. EJ was the only one to decipher the look on his face. EJ passed the sleeping child to his mother and went to meet his friend in the half way. As soon as he had taken his first steps the door was opened and the doctor came to talk to Sami.

"What is it?" EJ gestured to Steve who nodded at the doctor and shook his head.

"Miss Brady?"

"That's me", Sami stood up again gazing at the doctor, "How is my daughter."

"She will make a full recovery", the doctor said and paused for a second as the family and their friends sighed in relief.

"Thank you doctor", Sami said but continued after detecting the hesitation, "What aren't you telling me?"

"Miss Brady, your daughter has a extremely rare blood type-" As the doctor began his explanation all that Sami could think was: _"Oh dear god no! Not again! Why does this keep happening to me!" _

"Are you absolutely sure?" Sami asked as the doctor had finished speaking.

"I am. As I told your husband the last time the twins needed medical attention-"

"He is my ex-husband", Sami reacted, "Wait. The last time the twins needed medical attention. I wasn't aware of anything like that!"

"Your husband, er, ex-husband demanded us to retake the tests and assured that you had sanctioned these tests."

"Is it true?" EJ asked. Steve glanced at his heartbroken friend and squeezed his shoulder encouragingly.  
"Lucas blabbered about it in the police car. I'm sorry that you are the last to know." EJ nodded. He didn't need to say anything. These two men had reached the point where words were the necessary evil when communicating with others. EJ knew what Steve wanted to ask but wouldn't, and he shook his head.

She had finally reached the point where she could see the bigger picture. Sami glanced around her and ignored the hope in her sons eyes and the analytical gaze Marie gave her. Sami knew her friend had switched to her lawyer mode and was calculating strategies but the only one Sami wanted to see had veiled his eyes. She saw EJ leaning to say something to Steve and turning his back the third time to her. As EJ walked away Steve came closer and relayed the message to her:

"You two will talk, later. Emilia is waiting for him."


	29. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

Two days later Sami was on getting ready to return to the hospital. The cut Lucas had given her, hadn't been as bad as they had first thought and Kath should be released from the hospital soon. Will was at school and Johnny was with Caroline and Shawn Sr for the day. Sami was gathering things she needed with her that day but finding anything from her desk had become quite a feat. Anxiety took over as she realized the workload waiting for her. Sami wasn't ready to hire an assistant but she wished for someone to help her at home. Will was doing his part but school was demanding more and more of his attention as was his exponentially growing interest in racing. Sami tried not to let her thoughts wander off to another racer but it was too late. Would EJ be there for her and the twins? Sami was sure that EJ would demand his rightful place in Kaths and Johnny's life but would he also want a part in Sami's life? Had EJ had enough time on his own to forgive Sami the terrible lie she had told and would he want to try again? Was it too much to hope that Sami would still be his first choice or had Emilia replaced her in his heart in every single way?

Sami shook her head. She didn't want to think about what was missing from her life. The hole in her soul was so huge that Sami felt like her life without EJ was a shadow of what it could have been with him in it. When she finally found her cellphone Sami was ready to leave. She rushed to the door and surprised EJ in the middle of preparing to knock on the door..

"EJ", Sami said his name and silently cussed in her mind for sounding so breathless.

"Samantha", EJ sighed in his turn, "We need to talk."

"Right now? I was about to leave for the hospital."

"Yes now", was his short answer.

"Come in then", Sami said stepping aside to let EJ in. To her surprise EJ didn't walk right in but turned and gestured for someone to come closer and there she was. Sami found herself staring up into those ice blue eyes she had only seen in magazines.

"Samantha, this is Emilia, my fiancée." Sami had lost her ability to speak. The warm smile directed at her made her feel sick and nausea took over when she heard the soft voice attached to that tall, slender body:

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Samantha. EJ has told me so much about you, Kath and Johnny and of Will too of course." Sami made herself shake the hand offered to her and utter the words:

"Likewise", turning to EJ Sami added, "Why now?"

"Since I'm going to have a role in the twins lives and Emilia has part in mine, I thought it was time for you two meet", EJ explained, "We didn't want to dash in to Kaths hospital room without consulting you first."

"I can't do this", Sami whispered, "Not, today, not when I'm going to get my little girl back home."

"Samantha, this can't wait. I want us to be there when Kath gets released", EJ stopped for a moment, "Or have you changed your mind about wanting me to be part of their lives."

"No, I haven't changed my mind", Sami gritted her teeth and turned to speak to Emilia, "Excuse us, could you please wait outside. I need to talk with EJ alone." Sami felt like Emilia was laughing at her fake smile and knew exactly what Sami wanted to say. Smiling knowingly and nodding slightly Emilia declared magnanimously:

"I'll be waiting in the car", turning to EJ she purred, "My love." His feeble protest was silenced with a quick kiss and she was gone. Watching the door close behind the exquisite woman, Sami suppressed her jealousy and let the anger take over.

"Why did you bring here today? Why now?" Sami didn't stop to analyse his expression as she continued, " I know we need to talk and work out the custody arrangements but you really didn't need to bring her here NOW!"

"Maybe it was too soon", EJ agreed reluctantly, "But she came in town and asked to see the twins."

"You told her?!" Sami almost screamed in disbelief.

"I tell her everything", EJ replied staring at her closely, "I've learnt not to withold any crusial parts of my life from the woman I love." His words felt like a slap on the face to her.

"Why did you come here?" Sami asked.

"I told you. Emilia-"

"I know what you told me", Sami interrupted, "What is the real reason? Why now? Why did you come here _with her_?" EJ remained silent and something in his expression reminded Sami of the time she had told him that she felt like being best friends with Prince Charming. He had hugged her, looked deep in her eyes and fallen back suddenly and left quickly under the pretext to give her space and a chance to tell Austin the truth of a scheme she had been hiding from her fiancé of the time. After everything that had happened between them, Sami finally realized that it had been then, when he had first realized his budding feelings for her. Could EJ still be insecure around her? The thought comforted her more than Sami cared to admit.

"I'm sorry Samantha, I shouldn't have rushed this meeting. It's just that", EJ searched for the right words and Sami saw genuine happiness on his face, "Though I loved Kath and Johnny before, it's nothing compared to this overwhelming feeling I now have for them. I'm greedy, I want to see all the people I love in one room and I want to see it happen today." Sami understood all too well what he was saying.

"I can wait a little while longer. I guess I will have to but, please don't try to prolong it", EJ changed his tone from agreeable to stern as he finished, "Emilia and I will be part of the twins lives." Sami nodded and watched him walk to the door.

"Goodbye Samantha, Marie will hear from my lawyer soon."

"Bye", Sami said to the closed door. She felt helpless and hopeful at the same time. Her daughter was waiting and that thought made Sami pull herself together and walk out of the door.


	30. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

In that dark room she sat on her bed, holding her legs up against her chest trying not to rock herself. Kath had finally fallen asleep but not before getting into the same crib with her twin brother. Just the presence of Johnny was enough to calm the little girl who had spent two nights away from everything and everyone she knew and loved. Sami was relieved that Kath seemed like herself even after everything had happened and wished that she herself could feel as unaffected. Even if Kath wouldn't have a visible scar, Sami would forever remember the blood and the blade against her baby's skin. Just the shock of seeing Lucas threaten their little baby had been enough to derail her whole life but Sami had yet to fully grasp the reason for her ex-husbands uncharacteristic behaviour: Lucas wasn't the father of her twins. This pattern of thought led Sami to another disturbing change in life. EJ was now irreversibly part of her and her childrens lives as was his new woman. Sami coulnd't bring herself to call Emilia EJs fiancée nor would she ever accept that twig as the stepmother to _her _children.

Sami rested her head against her knees. She closed her eyes and started moving slowly back and forth. She shuddered. Sami had wanted something else. Her long forgotten dream of EJ being her twins father had become true only hours after finding out that EJ still treasured the frail connection to the twins. EJ had loved her children all this time though believing someone else was their biological father. That part had always been true in Sami's dream, but in her various scenarios of that one dream, EJ had more or less come to her begging for her forgiveness and love. Sami had always dreamt of the moment EJ would finally cave in and accept the fact that he couldn't live his life without her. In her dreams EJ had come to her slowly seducing her and whispering sweet words of forgiveness, love and promises of a future together. In her dreams EJ couldn't wait to share his live with her and only later finding out the truth of the twins paternity would have crowned their happiness.

The reality however differed from her dreams significantly. EJ had found out that he indeed was the biological father of the twins and he had chosen to walk away from her, for the third time. Sami was keeping score now. Three agonizing times she had had to watch that man walk away and trample over the pieces of her broken heart. The first time the man of her dreams had turned his back to her, Sami had deserved it. She could admit it now. Sami had blundered royally. For months she had taken his affection for granted, flaunted another man in front of him, almost burnt him alive and tried to withheld the knowledge of the possibility of him being a father of her children not to mention her worst crime. Sami had lied about that terrible bargain they had made. It hadn't been until Celeste had uttered the word that Sami had realized her power over EJ. By repeating the word over and over again her lie had grown enough to convince him of a crime he hadn't commit. Somehow Sami had found the strength to finally grow up enough and face the truth about herself and her feelings without having someone else to spell them out for her. Somehow she had found the courage to go to him and tell truth knowing fully well that he wouldn't forgive her. EJ had acted just as Sami had imagined. In a blink of an eye his warm feelings had cooled and he had walked out of her life. Sami had deserved that.

The second time the love of her life had turned his back on her Sami had firts attacked his new love and life partner. Sami hadn't been able to control herself or her feelings very well and she had said all the wrong things. Now Sami realized that the moment on that street had been her chance to partly restore the trust between them. Against his better judgement EJ had extended his hand and offered a casual friendship to her and Sami had blundered that too by starting to talk about something she knew he would never accept and believe in. EJ believed that people made their own fate but Sami had started talking about some grand design and connection between them through time and space. Sami had spoken of a destiny and reincarnation to correct past mistakes. She had spoken and watched him draw back and shut her out. He had changed his mind and said his goodbyes walking once again away from her. Sami was quite sure she hadn't actually deserved that but she _had _brought it on herself.

The third time had been something completely different. Sami had needed him by her side and to be there for their daughter. Sami had needed EJ to be the knight in shining armour or at least the man to lean on to. That time Sami hadn't forged the test results, she hadn't even known that there still was any uncertainty about the paternity. EJ had been there with her telling how much he loved Kath and Johnny only moments before Kath had been cut. And EJ had been there to hear the doctor tell about the test done on the request of Lucas Roberts. Steve had confirmed this and EJ must have seen the shock on her face. Sami hadn't known. The last time EJ had walked away breaking her heart once again, Sami knew for sure that she hadn't deserve it. Just like she hadn't deserved to have Emilia being thrown at her right as she was about to leave to the hospital to reclaim her daughter. Sami knew that EJ loved Kath. Sami understood that he wanted to see her and she understood that Emilia would want to meet the twins. Sami could even appreciate the fact that instead of waltzing sraigth into Kaths hospital room EJ had thought of asking her first. EJ had brought Emilia to her so they could meet and agree on the conditions of Emilia meeting the twins. When Sami was calm and rational enough she could see and understand all this. What she couldn't comprehend even in her sanest moments was, why had EJ brought Emilia meet her just then. He must have known that bringing Emilia into the picture this soon would only anger Sami and throw her off balance. _Was the man intentionally trying to built a wall between them?_ And if he was, _what or who was he protecting?_

_**A/N Please review... I can see from the stats that people are reading this story but I'm longing to know what you think. I'm not currently liking Sami's character in the show very much and this story has been my way of reaching out to her and to the scheming vixen she used to be. Am I succeeding or is this just another way to waste my time? So please review.**  
_


	31. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

The next morning Sami was getting up ready to leave for a work meeting with a potential new client, thought she hated the idea of leaving her children alone. Will had assured her that he was quite capable of taking care of the twins for few hours and that if he felt like he wouldn't, he knew exactly who to call to, his grandmother Caroline. Sami had had chuckled at that and went to change into her business outfit. Sami hadn't liked wearing suits before but when she and Marie had become friends a new world had opened up to her. Marie had been responsible for her transformed appearance. Somehow the right skirt combined with the right heels was just what Sami needed to believe in her own invincibility. The blouse gave her new kind of mature sex appeal which came handy with the male clients and the jacket was her armour. While Sami was wearing that jacket nothing negative could reach and cut her too deep.

She was finishing her make-up when Will brought her her cell phone and said that Marie was waiting to talk to her. Sami grabbed the phone and said breathlessly:

"Marie? What is it?"

"Not quite the greeting I was expecting but I'll take it", Marie replied freakishly cheerfully, "Are you sitting down? Are you wearing your heels?" Sami kicked off the heels she had just slipped on and went to sit on her bed. Usually when Marie started a conversation like this she had something really shocking to tell her.

"No heels, sitting down now", Sami said and waited. Unlike the last time when this had happened Marie stayed silent for a while before starting gently:

"Mr Hamley just left my office. He came by to leave the preliminary custody papers and suggestions Mr Wells had made."

"What does EJ want?" Sami asked with a lump in her throat.

"Apparently he's willing to give you some time to get Lucas out of the picture your way and then when that's done he wants a shared custody-"

"Obviously", Sami interrupted her friend.

"That's not all Sami", Maries voice was getting fragile, "Are the kids there? Is there a safe distance between you and them?"

"Marie! I'm alone. The twins are in the other room with Will. Now tell me what-"

"He wants to buy them a house." Her heart missed a beat. Sami wasn't sure her hearing was still a functional sense.

"Excuse me?"

"EJ wants to buy a house for the twins and he wants you and the kids, including Will, to move in there. He has actually explained the arrangement quite eloquently in this paper I have in front of me."

"Marie?" Sami heard her friend sigh as she was about to reveal the catch in this deal.

"It would be a semi detached house with the smaller half sealed off while the Wells couple is out of town. You and the kids would live in the main house and EJ and Emilia in the guest house while staying in Salem. This way-"

"What?!" Sami was screaming now loud enough to worry her firstborn. Will came bursting in with a wild look on his face.

"I'm sorry Will, please go back to the other room", Sami spoke to her son much more unflappably than she felt and then directing her words to her lawyer, "Why do you sound so happy about this?"

"Because it's actually a really good deal for you. Besides, the house isn't for you; it's for Kath and Johnny. And the way the papers are drawn up, neither he or you could take it from them while they are alive. And with the schedule draft provided to us, he wouldn't be present that much to interfere in your life. This way, the twins won't have to deal with problems that come along with parents living in two different places and it would make their supervised visits easier."

"Easy? How can you say this is easy?" Sami couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Sami calm down", Marie tried to soothe her, "I know you are still hung up on him and can't accept the fact that he's moved on but Sami, you really need to stop and think what's best for your children. Just last week you were wondering what you were going to do when the twins grow up. You need to move out of that tiny apartment and this is, let's face it, a dream come true for you."

"I can't believe you are actually saying that. And you call yourself a friend", Sami wasn't even try to hide the accusing tone from Marie.

"I call myself your friend because I know you and what you've been through", Marie replied with a cold and steely voice, "I know that this is how you react when scared and out of options, or you think you are out of options. Sami, I do admire the fire and the spirit that keeps you fighting until the end but I'm also friend enough to tell you when to SNAP OUT OF IT!" Sami took few deep breaths.

"Thank you Marie."

"You are welcome. Now close your eyes for few seconds then look in the mirror, say 'I can do this' like you mean it, smile, put on those heels and go to that meeting you have. I will come over to talk about this later and Sami, we do need to talk about _all_ the aspects of this case."

"I know Marie", Sami was beaten.

"That's not the warrior I know. Fake it if you have to but charm those clients and we'll celebrate tonight", Marie said with her most supportive tone.

"I will", Sami replied sounding little more like herself, "Marie?"

"Yes Sami?"

"You do know that this is going to break my heart and you are going to have to pick up the pieces, do you?"

"I know", Marie sighed knowing only too well what Sami meant, "You know what. I'm going to return the favour and get you a new heart. One without EJ Wells in it." Sami smiled dolefully:

"I thought you had gotten over him?"

"It's never really over but I don't need to tell you that, do I?" Marie replied grimacing to the walls in her office.

"No you don't", Sami agreed almost silently.

"We'll talk tonight. Good luck with the meeting."

"I don't need luck", Sami said as the smile slowly took over her face again, "I'm invincible."

"With those heals? Yes you are."


	32. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

Sami was coming out of a building and on her way home from the meeting when she heard someone calling out her name.

"Samantha? Samantha Brady! Please wait." Sami made the irreversible mistake of turning and looking who was calling for her. It was Emilia and as soon as their eyes met, Sami knew it was too late for her to try and run. That twig would catch her with few steps.

"Oh hello", Emilia came to her and smiled warmly, "I thought it was you. Nice to meet you again." Sami forced herself to relax and smiled courteously:

"Hello, Emilia wasn't it?" Her little sting missed it's mark and the tall brunette only kept smiling and talking with her bubbly voice:

"Yes. It is so refreshing to be able to move around incognito here in America. In Europe this would be quite impossible."

"What this?" Sami couldn't stop herself from asking.

"Meeting a friend on the street accidentally, without paparazzi blocking every exit."

"I wouldn't know", Sami replied flatly.

"Of course not", Emilia replied automatically and regretted it an instant later, "How terribly rude of me. I'm not usually this chatty, only when I'm nervous, I had planned to say-" Sami saw Emilia taking of her shades so their blue gazes could meet. Suddenly the tall brunette looked solemn and apologetic:

"I am truly sorry for what happened yesterday. I should have known better than ask to see the twins so soon. EJ has this unfortunate tendency of taking my requests literally. I was planning on giving you two time and space to work things out, but I was just so excited for him finding about the paternity and terribly worried for the little girl and her wound at the same time, that the words just fell out of my mouth." Sami didn't want to believe her. She didn't want to see it but there was sincerity in Emilias voice and in her movements. Sami reluctantly nodded:

"Apology accepted." There was an awkward silence which Emilia ended:

"I do mean what I said earlier, about us being friends. Samantha, I do want us to be friends for the children's sake if nothing more." Sami kept quiet wanting to walk away without saying a word but unable to do so. Emilia continued talking with her soft voice:

"I assume EJs told you about me and how we met because he's told me so much about you. You and the children are important to him and I don't want to hinder his relationship with the twins in any way. So if I must stay back and wait until you Samantha, are ready to accept me as a part of Kaths and Johnny's lives, I will." Sami nodded again this time smiling just a little:

"I appreciate that."

"Thank you Samantha."

"It's Sami."

"What happened then?" Marie asked throwing a handful of popcorn into her mouth.

"Then the twig took me shopping", Sami said grabbing the wine glass.

"No!" Marie mumbled with her mouth still full of popcorn.

"Yes! She insisted on giving something to the twins and since she hadn't seen them and wouldn't be seeing them for a very long time, she dragged me through the designer shops and paid for a couple of ridiculously expensive get-ups, which the twins wont ever have the chance to wear, and then she gave me a ride home."

"No!"

"Yes!" Sami sipped her wine and Marie asked with an empty mouth this time:

"What did you talk about? You must have talked about something while shopping."

"She gave me a crash course on upcoming European fashion and a quick summary of her career."

"Did she say anything about EJ?" Sami almost spilled her drink. She turned to look at her best friend who was already handing her a towel.

"Why do you ask?"

"You know exactly why."

"Infuriating little-"

"Hey watch what you say or I will misplace your new contracts for a while", Marie stopped Sami from saying something she would regret.

"You wouldn't do that!" Sami protested.

"Wouldn't I?" Marie tilted her head and gazed Sami slyly.

"I don't understand why I'm friends with you?" Sami wondered aloud and grabbed some popcorn.

"Neither do I but don't try to change the subject. Did she talk about him?"

Sami concentrated on the popcorn in her mouth and thought back the day she had had.

"Emilia didn't tell me anything I didn't already know", Sami finally said.

"What's that supposed to mean? Did she give you the storybook version of their life together?" Marie wondered.

"No, not exactly. It wasn't quite like she was giving an magazine interview but almost. There were those little details that tell about the real life behind the curtains but-"

"But what?"

"I don't know. It seemed like something was missing. Maybe it's just different for them", Sami shrugged and swigged some more wine.

"It's _not_ just different for them! Sami, we both know that relationships either work or don't. Oh, don't you look at me like that. You know _exactly_ what I'm getting at", Marie pointed her perfectly manicured finger at Sami, "If you think that there's something missing between them, if you have any doubts about his happiness, I think you should act on it."

"Marie! Where is this coming from? I thought you hate EJ."

"I do. I hate him with every fiber of my being just as you should hate him", Marie confirmed Sami's words, "I also know you Sami. I know that you love him and once upon time you two could have had a perfect fairy-tale romance but something went terribly wrong. I know that you need to move on with your life and the only way for you to do that, is to go after EJ. Naturally it will be a mistake. Unfortunately for you Sami, you are the kind of person who needs to repeat her mistakes several times before finally learning the lesson."

"Maybe I used to be that person but I'm not any more", Sami protested.

"Your head might have learnt the lesson but your heart hasn't", Marie stated and sighed then, "In some ways I envy you Sami. I wish that I'd made few more mistakes than I did."

"Are you talking about Logan?" Sami asked and saw one perfect tear falling from her friends left eye. Quickly Marie wiped the salty drop away and forced her expressions under control.

"Yeah. I'm talking about Logan. We broke each others hearts so many times but I'll always regret not taking that one last leap with him. Maybe it wouldn't have worked out, maybe it would have, I don't know. All I know that if I had taken that one last chance with him, I wouldn't be in this limbo right now. I'm constantly second guessing every decision I make, relationship-wise", Marie added the last word as she saw the question in Sami's eyes, "You have nothing to lose and everything to gain."


	33. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

The phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Sami?" asked a voice Sami wasn't expecting to hear.

"Yes, this is she. Emilia?"

"Oh good you recognized me", the voice in the other end said and turned to laughter.

"Yes, why are you calling?" Sami asked feeling little uncomfortable.

"We, EJ and I that is, are on our way to look at few houses and I thought it would be nice to have your opinion from the start too. I hope it's all right?" Emilia said sounding concerned.

"Very considerate of you but-"

"Ms Willowstream sent word that you accept the offer, the house for the twins. Oh, I hope I didn't misunderstand."

"Yes, I did accept the offer", Sami had trouble cutting in and saying what she must, "I just thought that we were going to handle this thing through our lawyers."

"Of course", Emilia responded instantly then lowering her voice little and saying, "I just saw this beautiful house and I think it would be perfect for all of us. I just have to show it to EJ and to you of course. I really think we have to move fast before anyone else snatches it. That is of only if you like it of course."

"Of course", Sami couldn't help but add and again she heard approving laughter.

"Good. Can you be ready to leave in five minutes? Emilia asked.

"Emilia, can I ask you something?" Sami replied with a question.

"You can ask but I'm not guaranteeing an answer for you", Emilia laughed again. Sami had to bit her lip when she heard Emilias reply. Why did this woman had to have such a good sense of humour? Sami uttered the question on her mind:

"How do you always pick the times when I can't run away or when I don't have any excuses to say no?" Sami could hear the smile and she suddenly imagined the warm spark in Emilias normally cold blue eyes when she heard her speak:

"Oh, I don't know. It's a gift? Is that a yes then? Are you coming with us?"

"Yes, I'm coming", Sami surrendered explaining, "John, my stepfather, he just got out of the hospital today and he demanded to spent a day with the twins."

"Oh, I absolutely _adore _John", Emilia said feelingly, "I'm so glad he's getting better. You simply must tell me all. But first get yourself ready, we will be there within four minutes."

"I will be ready. See you then."

"Until then."

Sami was walking in a big, old house and cussing silently to herself. She hated it. Sami hated the dark walls and she hated the high ceilings. Sami couldn't stand the old-fashioned windows nor could she look at the small details on the railings or on the sturdy doors. She absolutely detested it all. Then she stepped on a loose floorboard and snapped. Catching her breath Sami squatted down and grabbed the board. As she had suspected under the floorboard there was a small, perfect hiding place for Kath. Sami had already decided it was going to be her little girls room princess room and later her sanctuary from mean, uncomprehending parents.

"That tree needs to be cut down." Sami turned and saw EJ leaning to the frame of the door.

"Why?" she asked.

"I don't want any boys climbing up here once Kath is old enough." Quickly Sami turned to look out of the window. EJ was right, there was a perfect climbing tree outside.

"How do you know that?" Sami asked walking to the window.

"I used to be a boy myself. Climbing up a tree and slipping into a girls bedroom can be thrilling", Sami could hear the happy memory in his voice but when she looked at him, EJ didn't look happy.

"No, I meant to ask, how do you know this is going to be Kaths room? Johnny might like it too and climbing down that tree", Sami said trying to imitate the head tilt she had seen Marie do so many times. One corner of his mouth twitched and a light of laughter lit up in his eyes. EJ corrected his posture and took two steps into the room.

"You are picturing the pink curtains right now, aren't you?" Sami had to shake her head just a little and press her lips tightly together. A sigh escaped from her lips and she had to speak:

"Yes, yes I am." To her utter disappointment EJ didn't smile at him and say "_I thought so"_. He walked to the window and said something much more frightening:

"Are you going to turn this house down only because Emilia suggested it?"

"The thought crossed my mind but no. I'm not going to decline just because she suggested it", Sami said letting her gaze drop from the heights to the floor.

"Have you come up with a list of excuses then?" Her neck jerked as Sami found herself staring in EJs eyes again. This time she could read laughter and warmth in his eyes. Sami responded to his smirk with a smile:

"No I haven't. I miss this", Sami had to add and explain herself when EJ didn't seem to understand, "I miss you teasing me." EJ turned to look out of the window again.

"The tree can stay, for now", EJ said but Sami wasn't ready to change the subject.

"I like her. Emilia, I like her and I wasn't expecting that", Sami said admiring his profile.

"What were you expecting then?"

"I was expecting someone I'd have no trouble walking over to get you back." That did the trick. EJ stared at Sami silently without trying to escape.

"Samantha." Sami didn't hear the tenderness she had been waiting to hear for so long. All she heard was vigilance.

"I love you. That hasn't changed", Sami smiled a little, "What has change is my desire to confine myself with a second choice. It took me a while to understand that you EJ, you are my first choice." Sami braced herself and took a step closer until she was right in front of EJ. Slowly she took EJs left hand in her right hand brushing his engagement ring incidentally and almost breaking her neck when turning her blue gaze into EJs eyes.

"You once said that I would always be your first choice, that you would love and forgive me. I still believe those things are true. For a passing moment I let myself doubt, but then you walked away. I never was irrelevant to you. This wall you are trying to built between us to protect your heart, will crumble. This time, I wont break your heart. This time our love will be more than enough."

"Samantha."

"I'm not saying this because of the children. You remember that I came to you before Kath and Johnny were born and long before anyone considered the fact that they could be yours after all."

"The thought never crossed my mind", EJ said flatly.

"You said: _'You wont have me'_. That sounds like a challenge to me. A challenge, I'm willing to accept. I will have you, EJ. And you will have all of me."


	34. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

EJs gaze was killing her. Sami felt tingling all over her body and throbbing in her right hand. She felt a gentle squeeze before EJ let go of her hand and took a small but telling step back.

"It never was a challenge Samantha. I truly am sorry if you consider it as one", pausing for a moment to choose his words carefully EJ hunched slightly and said, "Honestly I'm surprised that you haven't moved on yet. I didn't think I had made that strong impression."

"You didn't. You just took a half of my soul with you", Sami replied quickly.

"Exaggerating wont help, Samantha. You've made a good life for yourself, thought I believe it's different you had planned. I don't think that's a sign of half-person", EJ said veiling his gaze again to hide his emotions. There was something in his voice that gave Sami more hope.

"There's a first time for everything, including the first time for you being wrong about me", Sami replied wanting to take his hand again and bring back that hopeful optimism that had surrounded them.

"That's beside the point", EJ replied as he smiled a bitter-sweet smile, "I am with Emilia now. She is the one I choose and there's nothing you can do to change that."

"Where have I heard that before?" Her question didn't really need an answer and they both knew it.

"The difference is, my dear", EJ paused again and glanced at the door, "The difference is that I didn't lie. I didn't lie to myself nor did I lie to the person I chose to spent the rest of my life with. I do still love you Samantha, I don't deny it. You taught me a lot about love and family and I thank you for it. But unlike Lucas, Emilia has known about all my shortcomings from the start and I actually think she loves me for my flaws more than even you could." To Sami's horror EJ raised his voice and asked:

"Don't you Emilia?"

The tall, slender brunette came to the doorway and nodded.

"EJ is right", Emilia said and shrugged apologetically, "Maybe at first it seemed a bit cruel but I very soon understood why he had to be as brutal as he was. Our relationship is better because of it." Sami watched her walk across the empty room which would one day be Kaths. Her gait was strong but silky. Emilia placed herself to stand by EJs side and Sami saw her interlock her fingers with his. EJ followed her with his eyes without blinking and when Emilia reached up with her free hand to brush some dust from his broad shoulders, EJ took her hand and brought it to his lips. Sami wanted to scream. She didn't want to watch EJ share a moment with anyone else.

"He even warned me that you might try to seduce him but as you can see, _Samantha dear_, all your efforts would be waste of your time. I can understand why you still love EJ, simply because, what is there not to love?!", Emilia said mastering the tilt of her head, "I trust him. You can't come between us as I can't come between you and your children."

"You couldn't even if you tried", Sami condescended to hissing.

"Nor would I ever try. But that is to say that I have principles on such things", Emilia jabbed her own little spike and watched it sink. With a turn of her head and a warm gaze between two lovers the dark moment had passed and Emilia was once again her bubbly, warm self.

"So what do you think about this house? Isn't it perfect or what? This room is like made for little Johnny, don't you think?" Sami wanted to share one of those meaningful leers with EJ but he refused to cooperate. Sami watched the couple leave the room and move to another part of the house. She desperately wanted to find something wrong with the house but everything in it screamed home to her. Sami hadn't only decorated Kaths room in her head, she also had picked out rooms for Will and Johnny too. Naturally she had reserved a study for herself and she had chosen the linen for the bedroom. Sami just didn't want to see all her dreams come true in this house, if it meant living a life without EJ.

"What did you think about the house?" Marie asked from her later that afternoon. Sami had asked to be dropped of to the building where Marie worked.

"It's great. I think EJ made an offer before we left there", Sami answered while kicking of her heels and resting her feet on the corner of Marie's table.

"Will you be moving in there then?" Marie asked absent-mindedly while moving papers from one pile to another.

"I guess so", Sami said knowing how to catch her friends attention.

"You guess?" There was a deep sigh before Marie continued, "Tell me. Tell me all."

"I kind of told EJ that I was going to win him back from Emilia?"

"You were?" Marie seized upon the detail.

"Am, I am going to win him back", Sami specified.

"That's what I thought. What did EJ say?"

"Basically he said, thank you but no thank you. And before he could say anything he really wanted to say Emilia walked in and he asked her opinion."

"He asked Emilias opinion? What a-"

"Don't you dare!" It was Sami's turn to save her friend from herself.

"How can you still defend him?" Marie steamed.

"Because I've hurt him, I've hurt him bad and I need to restore that trust we once had between us", Sami explained again.

"If you say so", Marie sounded doubtful.

"I do say so", Sami declared.

"Okay then. What did the twig say?" Marie asked leaning back in her chair.

"The twig? I don't call her that aloud, do I?" Sami furrowed her brows.

"Yes you do, constantly. Every time you mention her real name I need a moment to connect the dots. Now, what did Emilia say?"

"She told me how solid their relationship is and that I would be fool to try and come between them. Then she let me know in her own sweet way that she was willing to fight and wouldn't give up that easily", Sami's voice faded away.

"That twig!" Marie sniffed emphatically.

"No, actually it made me like her even more, as an adversary worth the fight", Sami said and heard Marie snort again. Sami didn't usually need to clue Marie in but this time she had to add:

"Just think it this way. If she's his second choice and I am his first choice. What does that tell you about me?" Marie ached her brow and smirked shrewdly.

"So you are trying to built him up as a catch again? It wont work Sami, I tell you it wont ever work. I will hate that man to the day I die!" Marie completed her outburst with a slam of her fist to the table. This unusually strong physical reaction caused a minor case of hair malfunction which lead to a freeing session of laughter. With a theatrical gesture Marie brushed the disobedient lock of hair from her face and leaned back again.

"As your lawyer, is there something I should know about your plans?" she finally asked.

"What plans?" Sami replied innocently.

"As your friend then, tell me am I going to enjoy watching this?"

"Most definitely yes."


	35. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

Her keys wouldn't cooperate with her. For the third time that day they fell to the floor and Sami squatted to pick them up again. She didn't understand why everything possible was going wrong that day. First her favourite pair of high heels had failed her when the heel in her right shoe had broke. As a direct consequence of that Sami had been late for a meeting with a potential client. She had ended up messing up her presentation and losing the job. Sami wasn't really sorry about not getting hired since she had more than enough work to do without a new client. Sami was also still searching someone to help her with the workload. She cringed as she thought the piles of work files on her desk.

This time Sami set her briefcase to the floor, held the keys with both hands and unlocked the door to her apartment. EJ had announced that he would be overseeing the renovation of the house he had bought for the twins. It would take at least two more weeks before Sami and the twins would be able to move in. The idea of a move made Sami shudder again as it lead to her to think of a new car she would be needing as well as all the decoration. Emilia had offered to help but Sami wouldn't hear it. That twig had too much say in her life as it was not to mention that she was still standing between Sami and the love of her life. Sami hadn't seen EJ alone after the day she had accepted his challenge. He had made sure that they were never left alone with the twins though Emilia had kept her word and stayed back. EJ was always there when John and Marlena came to pick up or bring back the twins. Sami had tried deceiving EJ and she had tried trapping in the apartment but he had always found a way to snuck out before Sami had had the chance to make her final move.

The only good thing about this mess was that it made Marie laugh. Sami's friend had been turning more and more grim as the days went by. Only Sami's exaggerated stories of EJs narrow escapes seemed cheer her up. When ever Sami tried to find out what was wrong, Marie would stare into the distance, flinch and shake her head. With a gentle smile and steely voice she would change the subject and demand to know what trick Sami had tried last. Preoccupied with these thoughts Sami pushed the door open and exclaimed:

"Marie?! What are you doing here?"

"Sami? You are home early. I take it that the meeting didn't go well", Marie just said and walked to her. She picked up the briefcase, pulled Sami in and closed the door behind them.

"What is this? And Will, what are you doing with those files?" Sami was stunned.

"I'm sorry-"

"You have nothing to be sorry about Will", Marie interrupted him and turned to explain everything to Sami, "It was supposed to be a surprise to you. I've been helping Will to catch up and organize your files. He's going to be your part-time assistant until you can find the time and need to hire a full-time employee."

"But what about school and the twins and your social life. Will, you have way too much to do as it is, I can't approve this", Sami opposed.

"It's not that difficult mum. You still do most of the work, I'll just keep things organized for you, take care of the mail and proof-read your typing. It's not that difficult or time consuming and besides, I need the cash", Will smirked shrewdly.

"What are you up to now?" Sami recognized the look in her sons eyes. She had seen it many times in the mirror.

"Never mind that", Marie jumped between the mother and son and handed a shoe box to Sami.

"What is this?"

"It's a gift and the original reason why I came here today", Marie said still holding the box.

"I called her mum. I wanted to know where to find you a new pair of lucky shoes since you looked so miserable when you left today", Will added and took few steps back towards his room. Sami stared at her son for a long time until the young man grew anxious. Will was about to make a run for it when Sami said:

"Stop right there!" Will watched as Sami walked past Marie and the shoe box. His mother stopped right in front of him and gazed into his eyes silently. Then suddenly Sami threw her arms around her son and squeezed him until he couldn't breath. It took few seconds for Will to react. He embraced his mother and heard her whisper the words which brought tears to his eyes:

"And I thought I couldn't love you more than I already my darling son." As they parted, Will tried to hid his face,

"I'm going just go and see how Kath and Johnny are." Sami watched her son escape to another room and turned to face Marie.

"Don't I get a hug?" A lopsided smile emerged on Sami's face.

"Sure. One for the shoes and another for secret that's bringing you down."

"Sami, please don't ask me that", Marie said looking heartbroken again.

"I wont. But just know that I'm here for you when you are ready to talk."

Marie nodded to Sami's words and it looked like she was about to break down and tell her everything right then had the phone not rang. Sami cussed silently and found her cell phone. She thought she recognized the number from somewhere but couldn't remember where.

"Samantha Brady speaking."

"This is Richard Thornton from Mythic Communication. May I trouble you for a moment?" Sami almost dropped the phone right then and there. She had to gesture Marie to stay silent as she changed her phone to a speaker.

"Yes of course. How can I help you Mr Thornton?" Sami asked only barely holding herself together.

"We are interested in hiring a new consultant for the company and we would like that consultant to be you Ms Brady", the strong male voice said.

"There are many, more experienced consultants even right here in Salem. Why, if I may be so blunt, are you calling me Mr Thornton?" Sami asked trying to whittle down the possible explanations running through her mind.

"Because you are the best in the business Ms Brady."

"Thank you Mr Thornton", Sami sighed dying to know more details, "It would be pleasure to work with Mythic Communications again."

"Again Ms Brady?"

"Are you not aware of my previous connection with the company?"

"No I'm not."

"That might prove to be problematic for our collaboration Mr Thornton. To whom would I ultimately have to answer to, should I accept this offer?" Sami asked wanting to bite her nails to bits.

"To me and to Kate Roberts, the co-founder of the company."

"That simply wont do Mr Thornton. I fear that I must decline", Sami closed her eyes praying for her plan to work.

"I wonder", the voice in the other end of the line faded away for a while, "I wonder if you would be willing to work with our head shareholder, Mr Wells. He is currently unattainable but if you are willing, I will set up a meeting with him."

"That sounds", Sami stopped to smirk at Marie who was silently applauding, "that sounds promising Mr Thornton. I haven't seen _my old friend_ _EJ_ for a long time. May I ask you to help help me surprise him? If you would be so kind and withhold my name by simply referring to me simply as _the consultant,_ so I will be able to reunite with him after being out of touch for so long. Would you do that for me Mr Thornton?"

"Of course Ms Brady and please call me Richard."

"Thank you Richard and you must call me Sami. Good day to you Richard."

"Goodbye." Sami hung up.

"I'm so glad that you never went to Law School", Marie just said in awe of her friend.

"You should be", Sami replied calmly then bursting out her triumph, "I finally got him right where I want him."

"Poor poor EJ", Marie sighed.

"I thought you hated him?" Sami asked trying to arch her brow again.

"That was before I saw first-hand what you are capable of putting him through."

"He's not that helpless", Sami just smiled.

"Then you'll need these heels", Marie flashed her widest smile and opened the box. Sami saw the shoes and sighed with content:

"He doesn't stand a chance."


	36. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

"Here is your _new _standard contract you'll be giving to EJ. I did what you asked and hid it best I could but don't be surprised if he's smart enough to let his legal team rip it apart", Marie handed a folder to Sami.

"Thanks", Sami said skimming through the text, "He wont hand this over, he'll be too busy trying to get me to leave the room."

"But if he does forward it?" Marie nailed her eyes to Sami.

"I don't want to think about that. But if he does, he really loves the twig more than he loves me."

"Might be the best thing that's happened to you since your divorce", Marie said grabbing another envelope.

"Why did you brought up my divorce now? Please, don't tell me there's something wrong!" Sami looked like a deer caught in headlights.

"No, nothings wrong. Things are actually better than they were yesterday", Marie said flipping the envelope in her hands.

"I still don't understand what you are saying", Sami was perplexed.

"I had to visit Lucas few days ago and he finally signed all his rights away yesterday. His trial will start tomorrow. Did you know that?" Marie explained nibbling her lips from time to time.

"No I didn't know. But-"

"He has agreed to testify against the rest of the gang and they all are going to jail for a very long time for multiple rapes, murders as well as for drugs."

"What about Lucas? Will he end up in jail or does he-"

"He wont walk", Marie put Sami's mind at ease, "I just happened to overhear some things he's gone through and I just have to say that I'm not at all surprised that he pulled that knife and cut Kath."

"I don't care what he's gone through. I wont ever be able to forgive him for hurting my little girl", Sami said sounding hostile.

"I'm not expecting you to forgive him. I'm just warning you that", Marie paused to change her tactic, "Lucas is not the father of the twins but he is Wills father. Will is going to find out what's going on in his fathers trial. And when he does, he'll need you. Sami, you might not forgive Lucas but you'll understand. The change in his character wont be as drastic as it has seemed."

"Thank you for the warning", Sami nodded slightly wanting to move on, "I hope you weren't talking about this when you said that things are better today than they were yesterday." Marie shook her head:

"No, I wasn't talking about the trial", she handed Sami the envelope, "As of today, EJ is legally Kath's and Johnny's father and you two share their custody. And as of today, the twins are very wealthy children."

"The house? Did EJ finally sign it over to them?" Sami asked taking the envelope.

"The house and the trust founded to fund the maintenance the house. As well as the individual trusts for their education", Marie kept talking and dropping numbers big enough to give Sami a heart attack.

"Do I dare to ask how much in total has he invested in the twins?" Sami asked and saw Marie shake her head.

"But you might want to know that he has also set up a college fund for Will. The money is his, but you will decide, if and when he knows about the money and how it's used. When Will turns twenty five he'll take control of the money."

"Why would he do that? Will isn't his son", Sami said taking the papers out of the envelope and skimming through them.

"Equality. I think EJ doesn't want Will to hold a grudge against his siblings nor does he want you to beg money from Kate Roberts for Wills education. Don't misunderstand me, you still can do that, beg for money, but you just don't have to. Besides", Marie hastened to add, "the money would be coming from Mythic even if you did ask Kate for it."

"Please don't remind me. I want to forget the possibility of running into her when I'm on my way to meet EJ."

"When are you surprising him?" Marie asked with a concerned voice. Sami had to snort:

"Tomorrow, at noon I think. But first EJs going to accompany John when he comes to pick up the twins for a visit."

"Did you set it up?" Marie asked and Sami nodded.

"The twins are hardly ever home. Someone is always asking to take care of them and since John had to stop working while he's recuperating, he's been wanting to spent as much time as he possibly can with the twins."

"Sami, I didn't ask that."

"I know you didn't and the answer is still yes. I want EJ to think that he's successfully avoided my webs until it's too late. If he that he has outsmarted me for the day I'll have better chance to get under his skin later in the office."

"That is if your plan doesn't backfire."

"Believe me, it wont."

Sami was going through the bag she had packed for the twins one more time though she knew she didn't really have to. Kath and Jonny spent most of their time visiting various relations and all their things were in the bag already. Sami glanced at her watched and to the door. She was just in time to open it before John had a chance to knock.

"Good morning", Sami whispered and welcomed John in.

"Good morning. Why are we whispering?" John asked.

"I don't know", Sami replied and burst out laughing. She went to hug her stepfather gently.

"I'm not made of glass", John said and squeezed Sami properly.

"I don't want to hurt you", Sami whispered.

"The only way you could hurt me Samantha Gene, is to deny me to visit my grandchildren", John said slowly as they finally ended the embrace, "Or for you to turn on me again."

"John, I'm so sorry."

"Don't cry. I know you are but everything is forgiven and forgotten. Now where are the precious bundles?" John asked with a widening smirk on his face.

"They are waiting for you."

"I'm sorry to interrupt", John and Sami turned to look at the door where EJ was standing.

"You didn't interrupt. Good morning", Sami answered and turned to leer at John.

"I'll go and get the twins and-" John started but EJ cut in.

"Please let me. They are in the bedroom aren't they?" EJ asked and walked across the apartment without waiting for an answer. This had happened before. Sami pressed her lips together and handed John the bag. He took it, glanced at the bedroom door with one brow arched and leaned to give a little kiss to Sami. Then John walked out of the apartment and closed the door behind him.

"Samantha, where are the twins?" EJ came out of the bedroom and saw Sami turning to face him. He had been ambushed.

"They are in the car with John on their way to where ever they are going today."

"Samantha."

"You have been avoiding me", Sami said sounding virtuous, "I never took you for an coward before."

"This isn't the time or the place to have this discussion Samantha", EJ wriggled, "I'm on my way to work."

"Problems? Incompetent employees?" Sami asked innocently still blocking his exit.

"Something like that", EJ replied glancing at the windows.

"Like it or not, this _is _the place and this _is _the time for this discussion", Sami said stubbornly, "You've been avoiding me because you _do_ still love me and you are afraid that I'm still playing my games with your heart. I'm not. Why wont you stop fighting me and give in?"

"Samantha, I've made my choice and it's not you", EJ said finally facing her calmly.

"You made that choice when you were hurt. You've had time to heal and it's time for us to make this work", Sami said taking one step towards EJ.

"There's no us. You made that choice long ago", EJ pointed out trying to calculate how long it would take him to get to the door and would Sami had time to stop him.

"And I've changed my mind. I finally learnt my lesson", Sami smiled again, "EJ, I love you and I don't care whether you believe in it or not, we do _belong_ together."

"Please Samantha, not this again", EJ replied grimacing, "People are what they make themselves to be. There aren't such things as karma and predestined fate."

"Am I supposed to stand by and let you make yourself unhappy then?" Sami asked incredulously and shaking her head, "You can't seriously believe that I would let you do that."

"As you yourself pointed out only moments ago, you don't care what I believe", EJ replied quickly.

"Touché", Sami nodded slightly, "But I do believe in karma and reincarnation. I do believe that our souls are connected and that neither of us can be truly happy without the other. And I'm going to act based on that belief. I will fight for our happiness even if I have to fight you."

"Samantha stop. I don't want to fight you, not now, not later. I really am late for an important meeting", EJ took one step sideways and Sami mirrored his movement.

"I'm not finished yet. Why would you give that money to Will? He's not your son and he is old enough to understand the difference in his and his siblings situations."

"I want to help him to be the best possible big brother to our twins. That's all", EJ said still hesitating to make a move to the door.

"I don't think that's all", Sami said, "I think you knew how much it would mean to me."

"Samantha dear, the world doesn't revolve around you."

"I don't want the world to revolve around me, I just want your world to revolve around me and our twins." As Sami spoke she walked to EJ and put her arms around him. For two seconds he stared at her with blank eyes then he took her hands and disentangled himself from her.

"I can't", he said and walked to the door, "Goodbye Samantha."


	37. Chapter 36

**Chapter 36**

EJ had lied earlier that day, when he had claimed that he was late for a meeting. Sami had gotten ready after his departure from the apartment and commuted to Mythic without once worrying about being late. In fact she was early. Sami arrived to the meeting nearly ten minutes before EJ did. If Sami hadn't know better, she would have said that the office she was directed to, couldn't possibly belong to EJ Wells. It was the same room she had been in years ago but everything in it had changed. The colours were darker and somewhat menacing as were the old and massive furniture. There were no signs of EJs second career as a reckless racer nor was there anything else remotely personal displayed. The only good thing about this impersonal room was, that it made it easy for Sami to hide in plain sight. She sat in one of the huge chairs in front of EJs desk and waited.

She heard the door open and close followed by hasty steps. Sami didn't feel as giddy or excited as she had thought she would feel. She smiled a sad little smile as she watched EJ walk around his desk and sit down never noticing her. Sami found herself pondering EJs last words to her before he had walked out of her apartment. _I can't_, he had said. _What couldn't EJ do?_ Sami waited and watched as EJ finally raised his eyes high enough to catch her gaze. His eyes were filled with deep, raw pain and overwhelming sadness. Sami wanted to stand up, walk around the table and embrace him. But she didn't. Sami was too afraid of scaring EJ into running away again. She feared that, if he would turn his back on her one more time, he might not come back.

"Samantha?" Finally the tenderness had returned in his voice as he uttered her name as a question. At last after so many months and countless lonely nights, EJ had spoken her name with a caress. There was the only proof Sami needed to reinforce her trust in their love.

"Yes, I'm here", she whispered, "This is not a dream." Sami saw him gulp, turn his face to the papers he had in front of him and change. His posture became tense and his expression forced, only the pain in his gaze remained. EJ tried to smile:

"So that's why Thornton refused to give me your name. _The consultant!_ Brilliant, bloody brilliant Samantha. And I feared you might have lost your edge."

"EJ don't!" Sami stopped him and fell back to silence. She glanced at her folded hands on her lap. She whispered again:

"Don't pretend, please. I don't want that."

"But isn't that why you came here, for banter and games? To trick me and to-"

"To seduce you? Yes, that's why I arranged this meeting but it's not why I'm here now." They leered at one another. EJ didn't want to believe her, but Samantha seemed sincere.

"Why are you here now?" he voiced the question lingering between them.

"I love you. You love me. I hurt you. Those are the facts. You have been running away from me, giving your wounds time to heal and you've tried to move on. You tried. We are still connected in _this_ life. And as you yourself once said: _It hurts to fight that connection_."

"Samantha, I don't understand what is it that you want from me?" EJ stopped her before she could go on. It was like he was afraid to hear her next words.

"You promised me your forgiveness before you turned your back and walked out of my life. I want to know have you, have you truly forgiven me?" Her eyes were begging but her tone was calm and restrained. His expression softened slightly.

"I have."

"Then what exactly is holding you back?"

It was like the time had stopped still. Everything that they had been through together flashed in front of Sami's eyes. It was like a small death. She knew that she had lost him.

"Samantha", he said with a deep sigh.

"Do you love her more than you love me?" Sami asked fighting back the tears.

"No", EJ stood up and moved to face Sami. He sat on the corner of his table and reached to take Sami's hand in his:

"You are, always have been and always will be, my first choice." Sami looked up in his eyes.

"Then why are you still with her and not with me?", a small salty drop made it's escape down Sami's face, "Is it the trust? You don't trust in me enough? Because if it is, I will do anything to-" Her words were cut short when his brow was arched.

"I'm not making that deal with you again", he just said a corner of his mouth twitching. Sami wanted to slap him and she did. She jumped up from her seat and punched him in his arm. EJ pulled her near him, only inches away from his strong chest to stop her from further assaulting him. Sami didn't even realize she had been holding her breath before she tried to speak. EJ brushed the tear from her cheek with his finger and then took tasted the transferred salt with his lips. Sami leaned slightly forward and waited. Nothing happened. She snorted impatiently, grabbed his pink tie and pulled him into a scalding hot kiss. His lips melted hers and the salt tickled her senses. The temperature kept rising as Sami leaned closer against his body. His hands burned their marks on her back while she ran her hands through his hair. Sami had missed this. She had missed this feeling of everything else fading away when EJ touched her. They had to stop to breath and as their lips parted she heard him sigh. Sami knew what the next words would be.

"I can't", EJ whispered in her ear, still holding her in his arms. Sami wanted to beg him to continue the kiss. She wanted to ignore his words and let the passion they shared convince him. Sami wanted to scream out her frustration and she wanted to him to take back those words. Instead she leaned back just enough to catch his gaze again and said:

"Tell me."

"I _can't_", he repeated with an apology in his eyes. He loosened his grip and started to move away from her but Sami stopped him.

"Tell me", she demanded with a new kind of determination in her voice. EJ brushed her hair away from her laid his hand against the side of her neck. He quickly mouthed something and pulled her back into a quick kiss. Sami was eloquently danced back to her seat and left alone as EJ escaped to the other side of the table. He cleared his throat and spoke:

"About this assignment of yours-" Sami watched his lips move without hearing a word he said. She felt alone and deserted. She felt the words he had silently said echoing in her head: _I'm sorry._


	38. Chapter 37

**Chapter 37**

Sami set the box on the floor of an empty room, her empty room. The walls were bare and her steps echoed as she went walked to the window. She had spent three days wondering what had went wrong with her meeting with EJ. What was still holding him back. Sami felt dizzy for just thinking about the kiss they had shared but EJ had been strong enough to end it. _Damn that man._ A weaker person would have been ready to give up, to throw in the towel and walk away. Someone who wasn't a fighter would have done that. Sami wasn't that person. As baffled as she was, Sami wasn't ready to cut her losses and move on. She had tried dating and she had tried to be on her own but nothing made her feel as alive as EJ did. She heard the steps only moments before she heard the question.

"Where do you want these?" EJ was holding up three boxes in his arms and waiting.

"Those are full of the twins clothes. Just put them down there and I'll sort them out later", Sami said. She watched EJ crouch down and admired the view.

"You should learn to hide that look better", EJ managed to surprise her. Sami quickly flashed a shrewd smirk at the forthcoming man:

"Why? Do you mind my ogling?"

"I'm engaged to another woman", EJ laughed.

"Why is that?" Sami asked furrowing her brows slightly like she was actually pondering the very fact, "Why is it that you still wear that ridiculously expensive platinum band though all you want is right here?" Sami stepped closer to EJ and reached to play with the buttons of his shirt.

"Samantha." Sami tilted her head at the sound of her name.

"How do you know it's _ridiculously_ expensive?" EJ asked behind the smirk he was wearing.

"I read a lot."

"A busy self-employed consultant and a mother of twin babies. How do you find the time?"

"It's all about organizing. Or delegating to someone who knows organizing", Sami revealed her secret. Her fingers were finding their way under the his shirt.

"Samantha." There it was again. That tender tone without a real rebuke.

"Should I stop?" she asked gazing straight into EJs eyes. She stepped even closer clinging to his shirt and balancing on her toes. EJ wrapped his arm around her waist to prevent her from falling but actually just pulling her closer into his arms.

"We should", he exhaled slowly.

"You could always walk through that door, out of this room to the hall, down the stairs across the main entrance and through the front door to her", Sami spoke slowly drawing out every word. Her eyes were almost closed as her nose found his.

"I could. I really should", he replied warming her face with his breath.

"Why don't you?" Sami asked expecting for a real answer.

"You know why", he muttered against her lips and slowly eased his mouth on hers. Sami tasted the tea he had drank earlier and the chocolate she had offered him. He kissed her like an explorer finding an old forgotten path and drawing a new, better map as he proceeded. This time Sami had prepared herself for the abrupt interruption. Again she read the apology in his eyes before he set her feet back down to the floor. She watched him walk out of the room and out of her sight before she opened the first box.

Few hours later Sami had kicked of her shoes as she was getting tired to dance around the house with them. She was trying to find a place where to dump the empty boxes when she heard a voice from a room on her left. Sami didn't even consider walking away without listening. The voice belonged to the twig.

"Are you mad?" Emilia was asking.

"No, I'm not", Sami heard EJ answer.

"You can't do that to a woman!" Sami flinched. So Emilia had found out about their kisses.

"I know that", was his bitter reply.

"Then why did you do it? Oh wait, you don't need to answer that. I know, I know all too well." Sami could hear her walking around the room.

"Thank you", EJ said, "I know you understand."

"Actually I don't think you do", Emilia was protesting.

"What? Of course I do. I was there wasn't I?" EJ asked indignantly.

"Yes you were, but EJ, the situation was different, we were different."

"Emilia, please, don't. I gave my word and I intend to keep it."

"That's just it EJ. You gave your word, you made a promise I shouldn't have ask you to make. I know that it's nothing compared to what she did to you but-"

"Don't bring Samantha in this."

"She already is in this. EJ, can't you see it?" Emilia pleaded, "She hurt you, she hurt you bad and I helped you to pick up the pieces and put them back together again. But now, she's changed- or not changed then- but she has grown. She now is the woman you always knew she could be and she still wants you. You are a damn fool if you don't go to her and claim her as your own!"

"I've committed myself to you", EJ said flatly.

"Yes you have, but that commitment was made when we both were hurt and recovering from broken hearts caused by our separate true loves."

"I did it to save your life."

"And you have done that but my life isn't in danger any more. Bjarni is no longer a threat. I release you from your oath. Now, go to her, go to Sami. She loves you, you love her and she's the mother of your twins", Emilia was shouting now.

"You don't have to do that."

"I don't have to but I want to. EJ, we need to end this charade before it's too late."

"It's not a charade to me."

"And I love you too", Sami heard Emilia say and felt a little sting touch her heart, "but it's nothing compared to the love I felt for Bjarni, still do. And the love you have for me is nothing compared to the love you have for Samantha."

"I can't", Sami heard the familiar phrase again.

"Yes you can. I've been watching her, Sami will understand and even if she doesn't, she wont complain because she'll have you", Emilia was using softer, soothing tones as she spoke. It was enough to make EJ open up:

"Walking away from Samantha was the most difficult thing I've ever have to do. Keeping her at arm's length has proven to be, nearly impossible. If I could go back, if I could trust in her not to break me again, maybe I could try again. But I wont survive losing her again."

"Love is losing and finding. Love is breaking into pieces and fixing what was broken. Love is pain and suffering and it's much more than that. The good moments will overcome those dark ones and you will built a life together. If this situation was reversed and I had a another chance with Bjarni, one like you have with Sami, I would take it. I wouldn't hesitate for a second", Emilia snorted, "And we are talking about a man who tried to kill me." Sami had to bite her tongue to keep silent. She had to bite hard. With blood dripping into his mouth, she retreated outside. Sami glanced back at the window of the room, she knew EJ and Emilia were discussing in. _What the hell was going on?_


	39. Chapter 38

**Chapter 38**

Sami was standing barefoot on the grass still staring at the window when Emilia came storming out of the house. She seemed to be cussing to herself as she got into her car and raced away. EJ had followed Emilia shouting her to stop and stay to talk. Emilia hadn't obviously been listening. EJ was holding his head in his hands and about to rip some hair out as Sami walked to him and asked:

"What was that all about?" EJ glared at her.

"Don't pretend you don't know exactly what's going on. You two set this up! When did you have time to plan this? Was it before or after that little performance you gave upstairs?" Sami felt offended. She turned up her nose at him and declared:

"I don't know what you are talking about."

"Do you deny listening to my private conversation with Emilia?" He looked absolutely wild. Sami refused to answer and just stared at him.

"Of course you don't", EJ threw his arms wide and taunted her, "Emilia was right, you've grown. You aren't about to let me catch you telling a blatant lie. Congratulations Samantha, you win this one but it's not over yet, not by a long shot." EJ took a step to walk back in to the house when two things happened. Sami moved sideways to stop him and he stamped on her bare foot. Sami cried out and all the anger was washed away from EJs face in fraction of a second. He quickly moved his foot of Sami's and scooped her up in his arms.

"I'm so sorry", he assured frantically and made his way to the front door with Sami clinging to his neck, "What were you doing out here without shoes?"

"It's my yard isn't it", Sami said.

"Technically it's Kath's and Johnny's", EJ replied and renewed his apology, "I'm so sorry. I didn't intend to trample you."

"It's nothing, EJ. You can put me down now", Sami said as they reached the front steps. She made him look at her by brushing his face gently and looking into his eyes.

"Really, you can put me down now." EJ obliged her setting her down to sit on the stairs. He squatted down to examine her injured limb. When his gentle fingers touched her skin Sami felt a heat wave suddenly rush through her body.

"Does this hurt?" EJ asked as he bent her foot and toes. Sami had to clear her throat and shake her head to clear her mind.

"No it doesn't. Do you want to tell me what happened?" she asked.

"You were there listening weren't you?" EJs gaze pierced her. Sami pouted.

"I only overheard a part of it and it wasn't a set up. It was a pure coincidence that I happened to walk through that hall right then." EJ looked at her and he her foot down. Sami wanted to groan. EJ moved to sit next to her on the steps.

"You might not have planned it, but Emilia sure did."

Sami looked at the man sitting next to her. He looked sad and troubled. Sami grabbed EJs hand and brought it on her lap.

"Who is Bjarni?"

"Emilia's ex-boyfriend", EJ replied staring at the alley expecting to see Emilia return.

"That much I deduced from the part of the conversation I overheard. Details please."

"He's the son of a local crime lord where Emilia grew up and he's the one who helped Emilia kick start her modelling career", EJ started telling the sad tale, "Bjarni was nothing like his father at first and when Emilia became an overnight success in the fashion world, they planned to run away together. Unfortunately Bjarni's father had other plans. He fancied her for himself and Bjarni walked in on them. Emilia tried to explain what had happened but Bjarni was too jealous to listen."

"Was that when he tried to kill her?" Sami asked and received a surprised glance from EJ.

"No. It wasn't until later. Bjarni's father ordered Bjarni to kill Emilia when they realized how much she knew about their organization. Not that Emilia would have talked. She loved Bjarni too much to hurt him like that. She still loves him too much", EJ said.

"How did you become part of all this?" Sami asked slowly drawing small circles on the back of EJs had she was holding. EJ stared at their interlocked fingers as he spoke:

"I was there. I was the one to talk Bjarni out of killing Emilia. I promised to take care of her, to protect her and my family name was, has been, enough to keep Bjarni and his father away from Emilia, to keep her safe."

"Is that all it is about? About keeping Emilia safe?" Sami asked still rubbing his hand with her fingers."

"Samantha", EJ tried eluding again. Sami smiled.

"I do love the way you say my name but-" she chuckled, "but it doesn't answer the question."

"No, it's not only about keeping her safe. I do love her", EJ said looking straight into Sami's eyes. She felt the ugly monster of jealousy rice it's head within her as she hated to hear him speak so of another woman. But at the same time Sami knew that this was the kind of love she would have to learn to live with. Sami would never again be the only woman in EJs life. She had had her chance to enjoy his undivided attention years ago but she had squandered that chance. Now Sami would always have to share EJ and his love with the twins. His love for Emilia was little different. EJ would always love Emilia as Sami would always love Austin, her first love, but that love would fade to the background and lose it's full meaning with time, if EJ would only choose Sami. She forced the light tone in her voice as she said:

"Of course you love her. She's gorgeous model and a royal pain in the neck." EJ laughed:

"It's curse. I tell you, it's a curse I have with picking the women in my life."

"No, it's a gift", her face was solemn, "It's a gift to pick those worth fighting for." They gazed into each others eyes for a long time before Sami turned her face and spoke quietly:

"Do you remember all those times I begged you to let me go to let me have a life with Lucas? Do you remember how I said that _if you really loved me, you would give me what I wanted_? I finally understand why you couldn't do it." Sami felt EJ squeezing her hand. Sami had to fight through a fog rising within her to say what she needed to say:

"It never had anything to do with how much you love someone but it had everything to do with the person you are. A different kind of a person, a better, a selfless person would be able to turn his or her back to the only true love in their lives. Whether giving up meant a better life for the loved one or if it was only to make them happy at that moment, a selfless person would be able to do it. I'm not that person. I'm too selfish and determined to get what I want to ever let you go. We are alike in that, EJ. We will stop at nothing to get what we want."

"I have changed Samantha. I'm not that person any more", EJ said still holding her hand tightly.

"You haven't changed that much EJ. You've only mixed your priorities. You think that keeping your word and protecting someone is more important than your own happiness. Those things don't exclude each other. You can still keep the promise you made to Emila of taking care of her, of protecting her and you can choose me, me and our children", Sami spoke emphasizing the last words.

"There was a reason why I walked out of your life that day in the hospital", EJ said still looking at their merged hands.

"Yes, there was a reason. I gave you the only reason you needed to walk out of my life", Sami said travelling through time and memories to that awful moment when she had finally confessed her lie and got her just reward, "But now there's a million new reasons for you to walk back into my life and become part of it forever and there's only one reason for you to stay out of my life."

"What's that one reason you are talking about?" EJ asked.

"A lie", Sami said, "A lie I told you, a lie you told me about forgiving me and a lie you tell yourself everyday you spent away from my arms. A lie of being able to live without the other half of your soul." They stayed silent as the world around them created it's own music. The wind kept whispering sweet nothings to them as they tried to find the right words.

"_I have forgiven_ _you_ Samantha. I think I forgave you the moment I walked out of that hospital room", EJ said with devotion in his voice.

"Then why did you leave? Why didn't you turn back and come back to pick me up from the floor and hug me?" Sami asked and heard him answer:

"_Love is often the greatest cause of pain _but enduring that pain can be too much at times."

"Love and the pain it brings makes life worth living." Sami said squeezing EJs hand even tighter. She looked down and realized that she couldn't tell which fingers were hers and which were his. Suddenly she felt happy and she looked up to meet his chocolate brown gaze and alluring lips. Sami knew what he was about to say.

"Yes it does." She took a deep breath and tried to hold it in but couldn't. He smiled that impish smirk of his at her, with his eyes glowing warmly again. Sami saw EJ slowly opening up to her again. He was letting his love for her shine through his eyes, his smile, his expression. As only he could, EJ saved Sami from herself with a single wink of an eye and melted her heart along with the mask of indifference on her face. Sami was shivering as excitement was running through her veins and blood was rushing to her cheeks. Her lips were burning and she was thirsty for his kiss. He reached to brush away a non-existent lock of hair from her face, touched her face lightly and pulled her face closer to his. They stopped to savour the moment, to take their last individual breaths before merging into one. Just as their lips were about to touch his cell phone rang.


	40. Chapter 39

**Chapter 39**

"Don't answer it", Sami muttered against EJs lips.

"I would like nothing more than ignore it but-" he pressed a quick kiss on her lips, "I need to answer it. I don't like lose ends and I need to give Emilia back her friendship ring."

"WHAT!" Sami yelled but EJ had already stood up, took few steps away from her and he was talking to the phone with a conceited smirk on his lovely lips:

"Hello- Yes, yes of course- What did you say? Who is there?- Where are you?- Don't even try it. I'm coming there right now! Don't move- I'm telling you once I'm there- Bye." Sami watched as EJ transformed into his old self. That handsome rogue had emerged from under the covers of an sad, heartbroken man. There was new life in his steps and his posture wasn't as forced as it had been only moments before. EJ trusted Sami enough to relax around her again. He came back to her and helped her to get up on her feet.

"Emilia called, she saw seen someone looking like Bjarni at the beach. I need to go there to make sure she's all right. I trust you'll muster the strength to wait for our proper reunion for a while longer." Sami was clinging to his shirt and moving her lovely chin from left to right and back again.

"Yes, you are strong one, you can wait for few hours. The quicker leave, the faster I return", he was nodding as Sami was shaking her head and they both ended laughing. Sami gritted her teet and a muscle by muscle she forced a resigned expression on her face.

"I want that kiss before you leave", she demanded pulling him down and melting her lips with his. She wrapped her arms around his neck and felt her feet once again leave the ground as EJ burnt his palm prints on her waist and lifted her up. Sami didn't want to repeat her mistakes and she started stealing small breaths in the middle of the dance their lips were choreographing. Unfortunately for her, he caught on what she was doing and made his move. EJ started kissing her jaw and moved down to the side of her neck. As his lips found that tender spot behind her ear, she closed her eyes and he set her back on the ground on the gravel making his escape before Sami could cling to him again.

"That was a dirty trick!" Sami shouted at him as he reached his car. EJ turned to flash one of his smirks to her.

"I love you Samantha Gene Brady!", he shouted to her.

"Hurry back!" Sami shouted back. She saw EJ getting into the car and drive away with the engine roaring. A deep breath helped her to keep her feet on the ground and head in the clouds. Samantha 'Sami' Gene Brady was happy.

Five minutes later, when another car stopped on the yard, Sami was still standing on the front steps unable to stop smiling. She could hardly see the woman getting out of the car and walking to her.

"Sami? Are you alive or just drugged?"

"Marie? What are you doing here?" Sami asked finally shaking of the haze she had sank in.

"I came to help with the move. What has happened?" Marie asked looking around dubiously. Sami laughed.

"Nothing like that, something wonderful, something you wont believe."

"EJ dumbed the fake bride and succumbed to you?" Marie asked still looking sad rather than happy or mad.

"How did you know it?"

"Darling, it's written all over your face. I'm happy for you", Marie said lowering her shades to veil her eyes.

"Marie what's wrong?" Sami asked turning into a worried friend rather than a glowing woman in love though she still glowed.

"Nothing important, it can wait", she did her best to hide her strangled voice.

"Don't you know me at all Marie Willowstream? Now come in and tell me everything." Sami lead the way and took Marie to the kitchen. Somehow she managed to locate the coffee maker which Marie salvaged as Sami continued the hunt for few mugs. Sami waited until Marie poured the hot, black liquid into their mugs and sat across the table from her. Marie took a sip, grimaced and blurted out the truth:

"Tomorrow is the anniversary of Logan Deans death. My first, one and true love died five years ago after I told him to get lost", Marie succeeded saying before bursting into tears. Sami found an almost clean hand towel for Marie to blot her tears in. Sami waited.

"We met in college and he was the classical bad boy everyone warns you about. Of course I didn't listen and I ended up wasting a year of my life in him. He cheated on me multiple times and I always forgave him just like I ignored the drugs and few other shady aspects of his life. Finally we got the pregnancy scare and I realized that I don't want to life my life fearing the day I get his child and would have to provide for all of us. When I went to tell him, I found him in bed with my best friend at the time. Pointless to say that it was the last time I saw her but Logan. He begged and pleaded. He swore he had changed and I told him to prove it. I told him to change his life and come back after few years. He did. He had made something that seemed to be a good life for himself but I had also just started working for this esteemed law firm. I asked a colleague to find out about him and what I learnt wasn't promising. Logan had succeeded but on the wrong side of the law. So I met him, I listened as he went on and on about his plans for us and if I hadn't checked up on him I would have believed he had changed. Stubborn as I was, I refused to listen my heart and give him a chance to explain what I had found out. I just told him to leave. I said that I never wanted to see him again and that the day I had left him was the happiest day of my life. I turned my back and walked away", Marie stopped to sip her coffee but it had gone cold while she talked. Wrinkling her nose she pushed the mug aside and continued narrating her story:

"He called that night and the next morning. My phone wouldn't stop ringing so I shut it for few hours and when I turned it back on few hours later a police called me. He said that he was a colleague of Logans and he wanted to tell me something. We met in a bar near my work where I heard the true story behind the paper lies the government had created for him. Logan had indeed turned his life around and he was a key figure in bringing down organized crime. Logan had been working undercover from the moment he walked out police academy. Then I went home and found a bloody corpse at my door. We had been seen together and apparently it had been the perfect excuse for them to get rid of Logan. He died in my arms and do you know what were his last words to me?" Marie asked and waited Sami to give her a negative answer before continuing, "_Alec for a boy, Marie for a girl_. That bastard wanted to name our daughter after me." Sami got up and went to wrap her arms around Marie. Sami held her Marie as she shook and shed her hot tears for a love she had lost.

"Do you feel better now?" Sami asked after Marie pulled back and dried her face in the towel. Marie just nodded. Sami was about to say something when her phone rang. She was going to ignore it but Marie gestured her to answer and headed to the bathroom.

"Hello?" Sami answered without seeing who the caller was.

"Sami! I know you and EJ have made up by now, but could you please sent him here. I really am scared."

"Emilia?" Sami asked hardly believing her ears.

"Yes, Emilia. I really hate to ask this but-"

"EJ hasn't arrived yet? He left hours ago", Sami informed Emilia who replied screaming hysterically in her ear:

"I have been waiting where he told me to be and he hasn't shown up yet. Where is he? _Where is EJ?_"


	41. Chapter 40

**Chapter 40**

"Where is he?" Emilia was still screaming.

"Calm down Emilia, Emilia listen to me", Sami used her most commanding tone, "Have you tried calling him?"

"Of course I have. He hasn't picked up after he told me he was coming here", Emilia stammered, "Where can he be? What has happened to him? What if I was right and it was Bjarni I saw? He might have killed EJ!"

"Stop it right now!", Sami told her though she felt dread waking up in her mind, "I'm sure there's a logical reason for him being late. Listen, Marie and I are going to come there. We'll figure out this together. Where are you?" Sami listened as Emilia gave her the instructions for reaching her and said goodbye before hanging up. Marie had returned from the bathroom to hear the last part of the conversation. She had her car keys in her hand when she asked:

"Where are we going?" Sami glanced at her friends red eyes before asking:

"Are you fit enough to drive?" Marie nodded looking more like herself.

"I'm just little dehydrated, I'm not drunk."

"Okay, if you say so. We are going to the beach."

Marie drove as Sami dialled a familiar number.

"Dad? It's Sami, I need your help."

"Sami? I'm too busy right now, call me later", Roman tried to hang up before his daughter would pull her in the middle of the drama also known as her life.

"Don't you dare to hang up. If you plan on meeting your grandchildren you'll listen to me. This wont take long", Sami added knowing how disappointed her father still was with her. Roman had taken it hard when the truth about Sami's actions on that infamous mountain road had come out. He had made a point to come and see Sami and express his sentiments on the subject by taking back the Good Samaritan award. Nor had Roman accepted the fact that his beautiful grandchildren were actually DiMera's and he had practically thrown a temper tantrum when Sami had coolly informed him that she would be moving into a house EJ had bought for the twins and that she would do anything and everything within her power to win EJ, the love of her life, back.

"What is it?" Roman yielded.

"Have there been any accident's reported?" Sami asked?

"No? Why do you ask?"

"EJ is missing. He left to the beach few hours ago and the person he was going to meet just called telling me that he hadn't shown up. Dad, you need to call me if you hear anything, please", Sami reluctantly added the last word. She had spent so many years trying to please her father and her family that now even small niceties burned her tongue. Roman snarled something incomprehensible.

"What was that?" Sami asked sharply.

"I'll let you know if I hear anything about EJ", Roman wrench each word out of his mouth.

"Thank you dad, I love you", Sami said and hung up.

"So he hasn't been in an accident?" Marie asked glancing at Sami.

"That dad knows of, yet. Keep driving, I need to make another phone call." Marie nodded and Sami dialled another familiar number:

"Aunt Kayla? Could you please check the hospital records-"

"Thank you aunt Kayla- Sure I'll call about that play date with Ciara and Tyler- Wait, is Steve there?- Does he know anything about EJ?"

"Sami look!" Marie cut in demanding Sami's attention.

"Just a minute aunt Kayla", Sami said to the phone turning to look what Marie was pointing at, "What is it? Why are you driving so slow?"

"A wreck. Someone has driven off the bridge", Marie said trying to see the car. Sami squinted her eyes and uttered the last sensible words for a while:

"Aunt Kayla, you've better sent an ambulance to the East Bridge. EJ, EJ is, he's down there in the gorge."

"Sami! Sami stop!" Marie stopped the car. Quickly she jumped out of the car running after her friend:

"Sami you can't go down there!" Marie caught Sami right before she fell down on to some really scary looking rocks.

"Sami, we need to wait for the professionals. I know you want to go there and help him but look, there's no safe way down and you need to think of your children." Marie saw her nod in agreement but she was way too smart to ease her firm grip of Sami.

"Do you have Emilias number on your phone? Someone needs to let her know that EJ nor us will be meeting her any time soon." As she spoke, Marie escorted her shaky friend back to the car blocking her only escape route. Sami reached for her phone and handed it to Marie who accepted it. Marie kept her eyes on Sami all the time while dialling. Sami wasn't crying or screaming, she was absolutely laconic and that scared Marie most of all.

"Sami? Did you find EJ? Where is he?"

"Emilia, this is Marie Willowstream", Marie interrupted the gabbling twig, "We can't make it to the beach. Can you get to the hospital safely?"

"What happened?" Emilia reacted well to Marie's voice.

"There's been an accident. EJs car is down in a gorge near East Bridge."

"Is he OK?"

"We don't know, we are waiting for the rescue party. Emilia, can you get to the hospital safely?"

"Yes. Yes, I think so."

"Good we'll meet there." Marie promised though she didn't know how to keep that promise. Sami looked like she would fall apart like glass dropped on a rock, if someone should stab her with a pin.

"Sami?" Marie asked once she had ended the phone call with Emilia.

"I just need to know that he's alive", Sami said rocking herself a little, "Anything else I can deal with, but I need to know that he lives." Marie nodded and grabbed Sami's hand. She squeezed it and muttered:

"I know honey, I know. As long as there's life there's hope." Marie knew all too well how true those words were.


	42. Chapter 41

**Chapter 41**

Somehow Marie managed to save the day that afternoon. She had felt so useless earlier when the bitter-sweet memories of her lost love and his deaths anniversary had crept up on her. Then Sami had proven to be a true friend by pushing everything in her own life aside for few hours and enabling Marie to vent about Logan for the first time ever. Marie closed her eyes for few seconds, she hadn't had the chance to doze off or rest but Sami was looking even worse. Marie had made some calls for her organizing the babysitter schedule for the twins and informing Will. Marie had also found the time to hunt Emilia down at the hospital and bring her into the same waiting room where Sami still sit motionless. Emilia was now sleeping on the couch but Sami looked like she hadn't blinked or breathed for days. It had been difficult enough to keep her still in the car when the rescuers had arrived. Marie had had to trick Sami to be able to explain what had happened and how they had found the wreck. Marie had promised the police to help them in any way she could if only she would be allowed to take care of her shaken up friend first. They had let Marie drive Sami to the hospital to wait for EJ. When Marie had tried to get a doctor to examine Sami, Sami had suddenly acted normal again and driven everyone trying to tend to her away. Sometimes, usually when Marie was out with Sami, she felt like she should be a politician instead of an lawyer. Her negotiation skills, ability to jump through sophisticated hoops and skills at bending the truth would ensure the world peace in few months.

Sami's phone rang and Marie cussed. Quickly she grabbed it wondering who would call at this time of the night.

"Hello?"

"Excuse me, I was trying to reach Sami Brady", a male voice informed her.

"How do you know I'm not Sami Brady?" Marie asked wondering why she suddenly felt so playful. She rested her eyes and remembered why: Insomnia.

"I know my twin sister." Marie's eyes flung open.

"Eric?" she asked sheepishly.

"Yes, how did you know my name? Where's Sami?" Marie sighed as the laughing tone reached her ear and made her tingle inside.

"Sami is here next to me but she can't talk right now. Maybe you should call back later", Marie said gazing at her mummified friend.

"What's wrong with her?" Sami's concerned twin asked.

"Nothing. EJ, the love of her life has been in an accident and we are waiting for the doctors to tell us if he's going to live or not", Marie explained trying to stay awake, "Sami is not herself at the moment."

"Well if she recovers within the next hour or so, please tell her that I'm coming", Eric said.

"When? When are you coming?" Marie asked.

"Right now, as soon as I can get a taxi", Eric replied.

"I will tell her", Marie promised, "We are at the hospital."

"I figured that part.Thank you- What was your name?" Marie opened her mouth to answer Erics simple question but it was like she had lost her voice. She gulped recognizing this odd feeling that something important was about to happen. Sounding like a husky temptress rather than herself Marie uttered:

"Marie. My name is Marie Willowstream."

"I like that name. We'll meet soon Marie Willowstream. Bye."

"Bye." Marie stared the phone in her hand trying to understand why she felt like she was holding her fate. Her eyelids felt heavy and she gave herself the permission to let gravity win the battle for a moment. She would rest just a small moment.

The next thing she felt was a gentle touch on her cheek. Marie opened her eyes slowly trying to focus her gaze to the most wonderfully coloured eyes she had ever seen. Then she saw the killer smile and she knew she was in deep trouble.

"Marie?" the man asked and Marie tried to comprehend how stranger knew her name.

"Yes? Who are you? What time is it?" Marie pushed herself up from the huddle she had sank in to while dossing. Eric squatted next to her seat with his eyes piercing through her.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Eric Brady. It's 3:32 am and everyone else is sleeping." Marie looked around her and realized that even Sami had finally given in to sleep.

"Finally", she sighed before realizing that she was now practically alone with Sami's twin brother. Before either of them could say more the nurse came to them.

"Are you waiting for news about Mr Wells?" the nurse asked.

"Yes", Marie whispered.

"He'll live", the nurse whispered back with a dreamy smile on her face.

"Thank you for telling us", Marie spoke quietly and felt the relief taking over her body.

"Aren't you going to wake Sami up and share the good news with her?" Eric asked.

"No. She's finally resting and few hours of sleep will do them both good. This time she can wait for the good news", Marie decided and looked at Eric waiting for his approval. He nodded and moved to sit next Marie.

"Sami still knows how to make life interesting, even in her sleep", Eric said leaning his elbows to his knees, "I couldn't have picked a better time to finally meet my new niece and nephew."

"You came for Kath's and Johnny's first birthday party?" Marie asked crossing her legs and leaning little closer to the handsome man sitting next to her. Eric nodded while his eyes wondered to sleeping Emilia.

"What is she doing here?" he asked.

"Emilia? She was EJs fake bride and shield against your sister. Don't you recognize her? How come you don't know this? Haven't you read any magazines lately?" Marie was staggered.

"No I don't. I haven't had the time." Eric stated.

"Then how did you know it was me you talked to on the phone?" Marie asked and saw him smile a crooked smirk. Eric nodded at her hand and said.

"You were the one holding the phone."


	43. Chapter 42

**Chapter 42**

Sami woke up feeling incredibly stiff. Cautiously Sami loosened her neck and looked around. Emilia was still sleeping on the couch and Sami could distantly remember her arrival to the hospital. Marie had dragged Sami around the hospital afraid to leave her alone for a second. They had made their way to the waiting area and sat down to wait. They had waited and waited. Emilia had fallen asleep first but Marie had stayed up with Sami and guarded her sleep. Sami turned her sore neck and searched for Marie with her eyes. Sami found her and saw that Marie too had had to surrender to sleep. She had snuggled under someone's arm and looked quite comfortable. Sami experienced little shock when the man holding Marie turned to look at her and mouthed a silent _good morning_ to her.

"Eric?" Sami whispered, "What? Why? When? How?"

"Good to see you too sis", Eric whispered back to her, "The twins birthday, a night flight and a taxi ride." Sami tried to nod but the pain in her neck stopped her.

"Any news of EJ?" Sami asked byt didn't really expect to hear an definite answer.

"The nurse came by to tell that he will life", Eric dropped his little titbit and saw his sister come to life again. He felt for sure that it was love his sister was feeling that moment, love and relief. Eric had only heard bits and pieces of Sami's life and stunts while he had been away but he had always known that she would survive. Until last year Eric hadn't even considered coming back to Salem, but the sudden grief that had taken over him, had changed his mind. It had taken nearly a year for him to clear his schedule for a lengthy visit home. Eric had wondered would his twin ever grow up and now he knew she had. He couldn't wait to meet the man who had transformed her sister into this secure, independent woman he had always known she could be.

"Are you coming to see him?" Sami asked sensing her brothers thoughts. Eric glanced at Marie who decided at that precise moment to rub her face against his shoulder and find just a little petter position to sleep in. Eric couldn't hide his smile. He liked the way she felt under his arm. Realizing that his sister was still waiting for an answer Eric turned to whisper:

"I can wait." Sami nodded smirking knowingly and walking away quietly.

Sami found EJs room quite easily. He was still sleeping when she walked in to the room. She went to him and touched his scruffy face. EJ lingered. He turned to rest his face against her hand and waited a while before opening his eyes. Sami smiled lovingly and waited to meet his gaze but as soon as she did, she knew something was wrong. His eyes were empty. Sami felt the terror take over her body and start to shake it. No, this couldn't be happening. She had fought too hard and waited for so long to be finally reunited with him. EJ turned his head and stared at her. He was trying to figure out who this stunning blond in his room was. Where was the warm brunette who had been in his arms the night before.

"Where is Emilia?" EJ asked with a hoarse voice.

"She's sleeping on the waiting room couch. We were so worried", Sami said holding back the tears.

"What happened?" EJ asked.

"Don't you remember?" Sami replied with a question and saw him move his head sideways.

"You were in a car accident", she explained patiently while still crying within, "For some reason you lost the control of you vehicle and took a dive from the East Bridge to the gorge."

"That's impossible", EJ said confidently.

"Why is it impossible?" Sami asked and saw him knitting his eyebrows.

"I don't remember but I know that I would never lose control like that", he explained.

"That's because racing used to be your passion. It still could be if you had more time for it."

"Really? I don't think I'm the type of person to enjoy such things", he said and earned a shrewd glance from Sami.

"Really?" He stared at her blankly. Sami squinted her eyes and punched him in the arm again.

"You lying little twit!"

"Ouch! Why did you that?" EJ asked leaning back away from Sami. He was holding his arm and rubbing the sore spot.

"You know very well why! Don't you try-" Her outburst was cut short when he pulled her quickly down and silenced her with a kiss. When she finally managed to pull back, Sami saw the familiar smirk again.

"You are going to pay for that", Sami finally said.

"Promises promises", he said and tapped the bed expecting Sami to join him. She snorted but obliged. It had been all too long since she had last had the pleasure of snuggling under his arm. Sami clung to him and buried her face against neck.

"You do realize how scared we were?" she asked.

"I can only imagine", he replied.

"Don't you remember what happened? Really happened?"

"Only bits and pieces. I think someone forced me off the bridge but I can't remember was it intentional or not. Is Emilia safe? Did she really see Bjarni?" EJ asked all along letting his hand wander up and down her back.

"I can't remember but I think she said she imagined all. Everything became foggy when I saw that car in the ravine."

"I'm sorry that it upset you but I'm glad you found me", EJ said and laid a little kiss on her head.

"So am I", Sami whispered from behind closed eyes, "I'm going to need your help with few projects. "

"What projects are you talking about?" EJ asked.

"Later. We'll talk later. Right now I just want you to hold me. I'm so tired."

"Yes my love", he assented.

"EJ."

"Yes?"

"I love you too."


	44. Chapter 43

**Chapter 43**

"Sami?" Someone was squeezing her shoulder and shaking it gently:

"Sami, wake up please. I need to talk to you", Marie whispered and saw her friend open her eyes slowly. Sami rubbed her nose against EJs neck before placing a small kiss on his lips and slipping off the bed. Few minutes sleeping in EJs arms were more refreshing than years of sleep alone anywhere.

"What is it Marie?" Sami whispered back, "Did you talk to the doctors? Do they know what is wrong with him?"

"I did. It took some convincing but I was able to find out that all they have found so far is a mild concussion. They are re-testing him for everything possible but it really looks like he'll walk out of this hospital later today. But that's not what I wanted talk to you about." Sami turned to watch her friends glowing appearance.

"What then?" Sami asked thinking of her brother and Marie. It would be a dream come true for Sami if they would get together. Marie would officially become part of her family and maybe Marie would be reason enough for Eric to come back home. As happy as Sami was for her brother and his career out side of Salem, she missed him.

"I've been talking with the police and John's ISA contacts", Marie surprised Sami, "Apparently Emilia wasn't imagining things. Bjarni is indeed in the country and has been seen in Salem. I asked Steve to look into it and find out what he can about EJs accident, if it was accident."

"Thank you for doing all this, Marie", Sami glanced at sleeping EJ, "But is that all?" Marie avoided her gaze and shook her head.

"There is more. I hope you don't mind, but I really need to leave."

"It's about Logan isn't it? You want to visit his grave don't you?" Sami asked and Marie nodded.

"I was going to ask you to come with me before all this happened. But you obviously need to be here-" Marie's voice disappeared.

"You are right. I don't want to leave EJ and I do need to take care of the twins too but I don't want you to go alone. Marie, you need someone there with you", Sami said staring into Marie's eyes. Sami could see that Marie wanted to object but Sami wasn't about to let her:

"Eric can take you. You two can get to know each other and I'll have everything ready for him once you two are back."

"Sami no. He just flew in last night and besides he said something about staying at the pub." Sami tilted her head mirroring Marie perfectly:

"You two had time to discuss about his lodging arrangements? Marie?" Sami smiled, "Plans change. I'm not sharing him with anyone just yet. Well, maybe I'll make an exception with you."

"Sami!"

"Shh. Don't wake EJ."

"And I was waiting to meet him finally", Eric startled the women. He was standing by the door and looking too lively for his own good. Sami walked to him and embraced her brother.

"You've been away for years, you can wait one more day", she said and stopped to look at her twin. Eric wasn't a boy any more. He was a man who took care of himself as well as others and he seemed to have a slightly darker edge to himself than Sami remembered. They would need to talk more later and find out what had happened to change him so during the years Eric had been away. Phone calls couldn't convey everything.

"I'll have a room ready for you by the time you get back and don't even think about staying at the pub", Sami informed Eric.

"Get back? I wasn't aware that I was going anywhere", Eric said.

"You weren't but Marie is and she needs a friend with her."

"I'm capable of taking care of myself and make a small trip all by myself", Marie protested.

"Under normal circumstances yes, but we both know today is anything but normal", Sami said taking Maries hand in hers, "Please don't fight me on this. You know I'm right." Marie hesitated for a moment before embracing Sami and whispering to her ear:

"You are going to live to regret this. I promise." When they parted Sami smiled:

"You are welcome. So it's settled?" Eric's eyes wandered from Sami to Marie and back:

"Apparently it is."

"Before you go I need a favour", Sami said and turned to look at the sleeping man in the room.

Few hours later after being finally thrown out of EJs hospital room, Sami was making her way to the penthouse. Her children needed her too though it was difficult to remember when they had been so close to losing their father. Sami avoided looking at all the shiny surfaces fearing to catch her own reflection. The difficult hours she had spent were showing but she didn't want to know just how much. It was difficult enough to keep her head clear and find the right words she would need to guide the conversation. Sami sighed and waited for someone to come and open the door for her. John came.

"Samantha Gene darling come in", John pulled her through the door and straight into his strong embrace.

"Thank you John, thank you for everything."

"Now now, I haven't done that much", John protested.

"You have, more than you know", Sami said looking at him solemnly. John nodded.

"EJ lives then I presume?"

"Yes he does. Though the doctors are going to keep him there for observation for a week", Sami said smiling little.

"How did you pull that off?" John arched his brow.

"I don't know what you are talking about but what ever it is, it is not why I came here."

"Twins then? You came to get Kath and Johnny", John stated and to his surprise, he saw Sami shake her head.

"Not exactly. I would appreciate if you and mum could take care of them for few days. I have a lot to do with the house and moving and everything for the next week", Sami explained as vaguely as she could.

"Sure, we would love to keep Kath and Johnny with us for few more days", John agreed, "But if they are not the reason why you are here, what is?" Sami met his eyes as she said:

"I need to talk to mum, alone."


	45. Chapter 44

**Chapter 44**

Marlena was arranging breakfast when Sami stepped into the kitchen. Sami had time to watch her mother move around in the room before she was noticed.

"Sami? What are you doing here at this time?" Sami listened as Marlena spoke and tried for the last time understand how they could be so different and so alike at the same time.

"Good morning mother."

"Good morning. You didn't come to take the twins with you did you?"

"No mother, I didn't", Sami said and sat at the kitchen table.

"Then why are you here?" Marlena asked with a frightened tone. Sami thought to herself how odd it was. Maybe Marlena had a sixth sense and she knew what her firstborn daughter was about to ask from her.

"Please sit", Sami asked and Marlena obliged.

"What is this about?" Marlena asked.

"I think you know", Sami said and gazed deep into her mothers eyes. It felt weird to have this much power over the esteemed doctor Evans who had been to hell and back and she had been drenched in several scandals, but somehow she still had managed to come through it all smelling like a rose. Marlena played nervously with her fingers.

"Why did you do it?" Sami asked and met her mothers eyes. A lie was about to roll from Marlenas tongue but something in her daughters expression stopped her.

"I honestly thought you were different", Marlena finally said.

"Are you blaming me for this now?" Sami asked.

"No", Marlena shook her head, "That's not what I meant. I thought you were different from me. I thought you had managed to finally get everything you wanted and that it was all you needed to be happy. I thought that you had learnt from my mistakes." Sami bit her lip. She had to take few quick breaths to stop herself from fainting.

"There are few quite scary similarities aren't there?" Marlena asked, "We both wanted and got the husband and the family we wanted. We both gave birth to twins and we both knew that our husbands weren't our true loves." Sami nodded and Marlena laughed.

"Though you have refined the stubbornness Sami. I couldn't lie to myself as you could."

"You are still blaming me and my lie for what you did. Aren't you? Sami asked.

"No. Sami, I take full responsibility for what I did", Marlena said.

"No, mum. I'm not going to tell anyone but I do need to understand why. It's still gibberish to me", Sami said holding her head in her hands.

"I will try to explain", Marlena promised and stopped to choose her words, "You had been struggling to change and you had finally turned your life around as it seemed. You had the man you had loved for years, the father of your child and peace with your family. You seemed happy Sami. To me, you truly seemed happy and content. I never considered the fact that you might be lying to yourself and to everyone about who you are to make us, your ungrateful and uncomprehending family, happy."

"Mother", Sami groaned.

"That is why I reacted as badly as I did the day you told me the truth about how you feel about EJ and Lucas and everything, how you had just wanted to be appreciated, to be placed before your sisters for once. Hearing that hurt, and though you had no way of knowing what I had done for you, I felt betrayed. Especially after you told me how Lucas had behaved towards you and the children, I felt ashamed", Marlena confessed and Sami couldn't hold back her tears. Sami had always felt like a disappointment to her mother. Marlena had always preferred Belle and Carrie over Sami and gotten scolding when her sisters had received Marlenas love and admiration. Now that changed. Though it wasn't enough to erase all the years of bad choices, Sami finally had a proof of her mothers love. Marlena had done something for her she hadn't considered doing for Belle or for Carrie.

"Did you realize how much pain you would cause by switching those test results?" Sami asked reaching out her hand. Marlena looked at the hand but didn't grab it as she shook her head:

"No I didn't. I just thought I was giving you what you wanted and what you had worked so hard for."

"You did. You did give me what I wanted and it was enough to open my eyes and stop lying to myself", Sami spoke soothingly, "When Nick told about the paternity mix up and that Lucas was the father of the twins, I felt my world come crushing down. EJ being the father of my twins had been my last lifeline, my last connection to the bad girl I am. All my dreams and hopes had been demolished. It was a rude awakening I needed and without it, without you mum, I might still be lying to myself. The twins might not have the father they deserve and I might still be trapped in a loveless marriage with a cheating husband." Marlena reached to take Sami's hand.

"As much pain you caused mum, it was nothing compared to the pain you saved me from. Thank you", Sami said. She could barely see through the shroud of tears, but what she saw was tears running down her mothers face.


	46. Chapter 45

**Chapter 45**

"Why do you want me to wear a suit on our twins first birthday?" EJ asked staring at Sami through the mirror.

"Because I have asked all the guests to do the same. The host of the party has to set an example", Sami reasoned and stepped closer to wrap her arms around his waist. EJ turned to face Sami and to hold her as she hold him.

"What are you up to Samantha Brady? You blackmailed the doctors to keep me in the hospital a week I didn't need to be there. You probably drugged me to keep me from objecting and walking out and now you have turned our children's first birthday party into a adult dinner event." Sami smiled as EJ spoke but her smile died as her gaze reached the three little scars flashing from his open shirt. Sami sighed and started buttoning his shirt gently brushing the scars as she proceeded.

"I told you that this party is as much for us as it is for Kath and Johnny. My family will come for the twins and they will dress nicely for us", Sami said as her fingers reached his neck.

"What about my family?" EJ asked looking down in her eyes.

"Tony and Anna will be there. I sent an invitation to Stefano too, I do know how much you love him", Sami replied.

"You are still hiding something", EJ said.

"Of course I am", Sami smirked, "It's called a surprise and I wont tell you anything else until it's time." EJ chuckled.

"I've missed you."

"I know", Sami said and pulled him down to a quick kiss.

"Where do you think you are going?" EJ asked as Sami pulled back and walked to the door.

"I'm going to check on Eric", Sami turned to say to him, "I don't think he's worn a suit for a long time. He might need help."

"What about me?" EJ pouted.

"You? You practically sleep in suits, EJ. You can dress yourself."

EJ stared at the door where Samantha had stood and smiled to him and sighed. So much had happened during the past year that he still had problems digesting it all. EJ was happy. He and Sami had found their way back to each other though he had truly believed it to be impossible. EJ had meant the harsh words he had said to Sami over a year ago, but trying to move on and settling for second best had been difficult, impossible in fact. It he hadn't been there to save Emilias life and make a deal with her to support each other during the long and painful healing process, EJ didn't know where he'd be today. He just knew that all other paths would have lead away from Samantha and to his destruction. His engagement with Emilia had started as a joke, as something to tease the hungry media with but it had evolved into something more slowly. EJ and Emilia had become friends and for a while they had considered starting a family together, when they both had believed to have lost the ability to love. Then EJ had needed a shield against Samantha and slowly the facade had started to crumble. It all seemed so ridiculous now. All the acting and pretending had been in vain. Samantha had still a hold over his heart and would always have the power to break him. Though now EJ was starting to believe that he might have the same power over her. After learning everything Samantha had been through the past year, EJ had cussed to himself wanting to go back in time stop himself walking out that hospital room after Samantha had confessed her lie. But Samantha had convinced him that in the end it had been for the better. During that year of terrors Samantha had learnt so much of herself, that she would never again try to change herself to please her family. She now knew who she was and what she wanted. EJ had teased her and said that he wouldn't hesitate to make Samantha jealous again, if that was all he needed to do to make her see reason and agree with him. At which time Samantha had smiled seductively and informed him that it would be his last mistake. EJ chuckled again and grabbed the crimson red tie Samantha had given him. If making her happy meant wearing a suit for children's party, EJ would wear a suit, for Samantha.

"Where have you been?" Marie whispered with a husky voice as Sami reached the guest room Eric had taken over.

"Misleading the host", Sami replied and glanced around her in the room, "Where have you hidden my brother?"

"He went to make sure everything is ready and then he's going to go and delay EJ until we are ready", Marie said closing the door behind Sami.

"Good", Sami replied and looked at her friend, "You look beautiful too. And you are blushing for no apparent reason. What has my brother done?"

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing", Marie replied.

"And there lies the problem?" Sami asked only to hear Marie sigh.

"It's all your fault. You made him go with me to Logan's grave. I'm a professional with interrogation tactics but Eric got the whole story out of me on our trip back. And he's been respectful and understanding ever since."

"And he's driving you nuts. Why don't you just grab him by the neck and kiss him?"

"Sami! This is your brother we are talking about", Marie felt the need to point out.

"I know that and I know it has been way too long since he last had a real relationship", Sami replied as she started to undress.

"Maybe I don't want a relationship", Marie objected.

"Then just enjoy each other", Sami smirked and waited as Marie took her dress from the closet.

"I would but he keeps me at arms-length."

"Shouldn't that tell you something?" Sami asked and took the dress from Marie.

"Like what?"

"That Eric wants more than just a roll in the hay. He wants a relationship with you Marie and he's willing to wait until you are ready."

"How do you know this?" Marie asked.

"He's my twin. I just do", Sami said as she slipped into her dress.

"Now all we need are few red roses for your hair and a crimson ribbon for your waist", Marie said and turned Sami to the mirror, "I would love to have a relationship with Eric, if only he wouldn't be related to you." The two women's gazes met in the mirror and a laughter filled the room.

The guests were arriving and gathering to the largest room in the house. Sami had been right. Everyone came for the twins but they dressed nicely for EJ and Sami, and that explained the few plain outfits. Roman hadn't bothered to choose his clothes more carefully unlike John and Marlena who were watching over the twins. The twins had gotten the chance to wear their trendy outfits which their aunt Emilia had bought for them. Emilia had reluctantly agreed to participate this party but was starting to enjoy herself as she found herself discussing the differences of European and American racing worlds with Max Brady. Eric did his best with the guests and finding places among the Bradys for Stefano, Tony and Anna. Though the feud had officially been resolved and the hatchets buried, Eric knew it would take all the patience he and Marie had to keep people happy and focused to the party instead of trying to strangle each other. Eric was so busy catching up with Anna that he almost forgot his main task of delaying EJ.

"What is this? Where's the cake?" EJ asked as Eric as they stopped to the hall.

"Didn't Sami say it's a surprise?" Eric asked and corrected his own dark blue tie which matched with Maries dress.

"Yes, but that doesn't explain much-" EJ started when he heard steps and someone coming down the stairs.

"Does this help?" Sami asked from the stairs. EJ turned to look at her and she took his breath away. Sami wore a simple, ivory dress with long sleeves. She had a rose crown embedded in her hair and a narrow crimson ribbon tied to her waist.

"Samantha, you, you look stunningly beautiful", EJ said, "But why?"

"It's our wedding day, if you want", Sami bit her lip forgetting her make-up, "Surprise."

"Are you proposing me?" EJ laughed.

"Yes."

"I think I should hear the actual words then", EJ teased her and saw Sami squint her eyes.

"Will you marry me?" she asked and stepped down to the floor and closer to him. EJ smirked and reached to his pocket conjuring small box for her. Sami opened it and saw a wide gold band ringed with sapphires, rubies, emeralds and diamonds.

"I will, I will marry you", EJ gave his answer and heard EJ and Marie sigh. Sami couldn't help but wear a shrewd smirk and ask:

"Do you swear to love and honour me and never to settle for a second choice?"

"I do. Do you promise to love and honour me and never to fake another paternity test?" EJ replied with a impish smirk. Sami laughed so hard that all the guests could hear her.

"I do", she said finally and pulled EJ into a lingering kiss.

"Now now kids, I think it's time to let others know your plan", Marie said clinging tightly to Eric's arm.

"Do you want to make this a double wedding?" Sami asked.

"No Sami. Today, is your day", Marie replied. Sami nodded and saw her friend finally giving into her own feelings. Eric responded with his own warm gaze and Sami turned back to the beautiful man who had given her so much grief and heartache as well as joy and happiness. Sami looked into his chocolate brown eyes and knew she had found her home. EJ took her hand in his, pressed a gentle kiss on her knuckles and asked:

"Shall we go in, _anam cara_?" _The words I thought you would never say to me. The words I thought were to be left unsaid and unheard. _Sami thought to herself and nodded.

"We shall, _anam cara._" This was her day.

_**-The End-**_


End file.
